From sleep hygiene to boosting energy naturally, here are the big 2024 health trend predictions: Nutritionist and author Clemence Cleave shares how to improve gut health through lifestyle and diet.
Wildlife Photographer of the Year People’s Choice Award winner A stunning image of a young polar bear drifting to sleep wins a wildlife-photographer competition
Over the next couple of weeks, I am going to try a digital detox, so I will catch you on the flip side.
Meanwhile do know you are enough, beware of compassion fatigue, enjoy the poem and humor, and consider unsubscribing from everything that doesn’t feed your soul.
Joy is non-negotiable!
Love,
Neville
“Enough” by Andrea Gibson:
Last night I painted a purple tree on my bedroom wall
I woke up this morning in a pile of leaves
The color of a million different faces
Thinking of that hand
That planted the seed
Of the family tree
That grew us all
And how each one of us
Will one day fall back to the ground
This morning
I was listening to my heart pound
Knowing with every single beat
That a thousand other hearts
Were falling asleep forever
On a day they never thought they would
And I know there are tribes of aborigines
That decide how and when they’ll die
After a hundred years or so
They walk into the desert alone
Offer up their breath
And within two minutes
Soar into a death
As beautiful as their life
And I was thinking I
Will probably never be enlightened enough
To decide how I want to die
So this morning
I decided how I want to live
What I want to give
What kind of song I want to sing
Now I’m no longer
Looking at my days like they’re a cup
Calling them half empty or half full
When they’ve always been enough
They’ll always be enough
To fill me up
If I stop thinking so much
And start drinking them up
Until I get so drunk and high on my days
I’ll be walking up to strangers and saying things like
“Hey, I know Jesus was born in a manger
But I woke at dawn today
To watch the earth’s horizon
Give birth to true rising sun of God
And I can’t stop singing hallelujah”
Can you believe we’re here?
Can you believe there are gods somewhere praying to us?
I want to be that nut on a bus
Who’s really a prophet
Telling everybody
“Smoking is bad
Stop it
You might be an opera singer some day
And how are you gonna hit the high notes?”
I wanna live like those high notes
That rise from the throats of old ladies
When they see little babies
Riding in shopping carts
I wanna start somebody’s heart like that
Taking ninety years back
So you’ll have sworn
You weren’t born
Until you saw me
Planting roses
In all the sidewalk cracks
So when you trip
You’ll fall in love
With someone you thought you hated
And now look at what that love has created
Look
There’s a sky
On her faded blue jeans
With a flock of birds
About to fly to my words
And my next line’s
Gonna rhyme with her eyes
And she’ll wink
And I’ll think I’m as beautiful as him
I wanna live my life
Like it’s a little league game
I don’t care if I win
Just wanna watch some little girl
Get her very first hit
Watch her father cheer so hard
He spills his beer
And decides to quit
I wanna split some woman’s
Tired eyes open
Wake her with her own sunrise
So she knows
There’s reason to be hoping
She’ll say
“There are stingers in my heart
But I’m sure that I’m a queen”
And that night
She’ll vow to swarm
Until every angry car horn
Is reborn a song
Of let there be light
Every angry war cry reborn
A song of let there be life
I wanna build the timid teenage boy
A microphone that will
Echo his rhymes
The same way
They echo in his shower
When he’s home alone
I wanna write poems
In the tone
Of your mother’s eyes
When she whispered your name
For the very first time
Poems that will make you go home
Pick up the phone
And call her
While I call mine to say
“You know those lines
On the kitchen wall
Where I grew
Taller and taller and taller
Put a couple more there won’t you?
Cause I’m growing up here”
No longer looking at my days
Like they’re a cup
Calling them enough
From now on
They’ll be overflowing
Since now I’m knowing
It’s up to me
To fill them up
The big idea: is compassion fatigue real? Can we really maintain our levels of empathy in the face of an increasingly brutal news cycle?
Unsubcribe from everything to start controlling the tech in your life:
Does the number of unread messages in your inbox leave you lightheaded? Do your thumbs ache from tiny-keyboard typing? Have you forgotten what your real-life friends look like without an Instagram filter? It’s time for an intervention:
NCPC Mentorship 2.0: Fostering A Community of Practice:
If you are local and want to grow here is a 4-month program I have had the privilege of helping ideate as part of my service on the NCPC Board of Directors to ensure everyone has access and opportunity to upleveling their leadership skills to drive social impact.
The mentors are all amazing and the program is designed to be a value driver for all that participate.
Note: This is the last week to sign up so please help us spread the word!
Every day, everyone in your organization creates your culture by what they value, believe, think, say, and do.
Regardless of what your culture was like last year or even yesterday, what matters most is what you are doing today to build your culture and make it great.
This past Thursday and Friday I had the honor and opportunity to speak to the Colorado Rockies entire organization. From the Owner, President, GM, Manager and Dominican coaches to athletic trainers, equipment managers, ticket sales, tech, etc. It’s rare for a professional sports team to bring everyone in the organization together, but the Rockies have a rare, special culture filled with amazing people.
It occurred to me how important it was that everyone in the organization was learning the same principles and practices for enhanced mindset, leadership and teamwork at the same time.
Shared learning experiences like this create a common bond, a common understanding, a common language, and common practices, that reinforce and strengthen the culture and lead to collective growth.
While I’m a big believer of diversity of people, diversity of thought, diversity of ideas and diversity of innovative strategies in an organization, it’s essential to connect and unite around a set of common principles, practices and core values.
For a culture to be strong, everyone in an organization must know what they stand for and live these shared principles and core values.
When a diverse group of people know and show their values consistently together, they are well on their way to creating a culture of greatness and creating great results.
Culture is created and you and your team can create a great culture starting today by what you value, believe, think, say and ultimately do.
Start by getting together and ask, “What do we stand for and what do we want to be known for?”
Then decide how you will live it and show it.
Thanks this week go to Larry H for the culture article.
Inspiration from the 20th Annual Nonprofit Governance Symposium at USD:
Last week I had the privilege and opportunity to help shape and participate in the 20th Annual Nonprofit Governance Symposium at USD.
The In the Spirit of Leadership session in the afternoon, included a 10-minute nonstop writing exercise, along with a mindfulness practice, and some affirmations.
While I love writing and word play, this was new territory for me, and the writing exercise unleashed another creative dimension of my inner self, that came out unedited, in one flow experience, with pen to paper for the duration, until we were told to stop and come back inside.
Thanks to Causmosis, Dr. G and Dr. Y for an amazing conference and unleashing a different aspect of my authentic self!
Here goes:
Causmosis Made Me Do It
Top of mind, this is an experiment in open cognitive/emotional expression,
Where I go, I do not know- just flow baby flow.
Towards the abyss, I cannot miss,
The arrow hits the target the eye cannot see,
The guru within comes out in me,
I am emerging, growing, nearly free,
Free to be fully me!
I stand in the hallowed halls of grace,
I cradle my young self by the face,
Mistakes are forgiven trace by trace,
The irony, the tyranny are dissolved in the synchrony…
Reaching out on bended knee,
Bruises do not tattoos be,
I am not blind, I surely see,
Into thee I see.
Into thee I see.
Is this my very first spoken word?
Birthed of creativity in the theater of the absurd,
Expressed from sorrow to be heard,
Why did I wait to flip the bird- to doubt, to fear, to lack of faith?
Affirmations simply cannot wait!
It’s time to walk, how straight the gait,
I’m living freely for heaven’s sake!
In symphony with those around,
I hear birds sing in the background,
I feel my feet right on the ground,
My spirit soars its heaven bound.
Causmosis sits to my left,
She wields her pen with deft and depth,
Inspiring artists want to know,
What performance plays in the “inside” show?
And so, I write and write and write,
My grip is failing- pressure tight,
Is this from gripping this little pen,
Or fear of failing littler men?
Who can say?
What do I know?
It’s time to end,
This delightful show.
WORD!
Great Things Are Happening EVERY Day, but you don’t Hear About Them:
These stories don’t bleed, and so they don’t lead but here is some positive news to offset all the bad stuff that saturates our media, day in and day out.
Great Advice for the New Year, Aristotle’s Rules for Happiness, Meditation Sure Worked for Michigan’s QB, plus How World Class Athletes Rest and Recharge
Teach thy tongue to say, ‘I do not know,’ and thou shalt progress” –Maimonides
The Best Advice we got in 2023: Expert-approved tips — both big and small — to take you into 2024 and beyond.
Happiness is not about maximizing the intensity of joy. It’s about increasing the frequency of joy. Chasing exhilaration is a roller coaster of regular disappointments and rare, ephemeral highs. Savoring daily delights is a steady, sustainable source of satisfaction. – Adam Grant
An Ancient Greek Recipe for Happiness by Arthur Brooks:
“Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.”
–Brian Tracy
Michigan quarterback J.J. McCarthy’s pregame meditation routine helped lead the Wolverines to victory. Here’s how it works: The mental strength that led J.J. McCarthy to success: “I can react from a higher perspective.”
+ 2023 Mind Bending Revelations in the Brain Sciences
4 simple daily health resolutions that require minimal time: Here are four simple health resolutions that require limited daily effort while delivering far-reaching health benefits — and some immediate gratification.
9 Mental-Health Resolutions for 2024, According to Therapists: Whether you feel reborn—or even just a little bit reset—at the start of a new year, consider making your mental health a priority in 2024. Why? “Because that’s the gateway to everything else,” says Guy Winch, a clinical psychologist, author of Emotional First Aid, and co-host of the Dear Therapists podcast. “It’s the linchpin that allows you to succeed or to fail.”
2023’s Mind-Bending Revelations in the Brain Sciences: This year was full of roiling debate and speculation about the prospect of machines with superhuman capabilities that might, sooner than expected, leave the human brain in the dust. A growing public awareness of ChatGPT and other so-called large language models (LLMs) dramatically expanded public awareness of artificial intelligence. In tandem, it raised the question of whether the human brain can keep up with the relentless pace of AI advances.
Experience the Beauty and Diversity of Human Spirituality in Pictures
Commune Through the Power of Live Music
WINTER’S CLOAK by Joyce Rupp:
This year I do not want the dark to leave me. I need its wrap of silent stillness, its cloak of long-lasting embrace. Too much light has pulled me away from the chamber of gestation.
Let the dawns come late, let the sunsets arrive early, let the evenings extend themselves while I lean into the abyss of my being.
Let me lie in the cave of my soul, for too much light blinds me, steals the source of revelation.
Let me seek solace in the empty places of winter’s passage, those vast dark nights that never fail to shelter me.
Mission Joy!
If you want to appreciate real joy from two masters of the craft and haven’t seen it yet, I strongly recommend watching this movie of the final meeting of His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu.
In pictures – human spirituality in all its remarkable beauty and diversity Love, commitment, dedication, and faith — the many forms of devotion as seen through the lens of one photographer.
Join me on Thursday January 4th at the Music Box for some Righteous Live Music to Kick Off the New Year with Strange Crew!
As we turn the bend on another cycle around the sun, reflect on our resolutions while tolerating disillusions, if more live music is on your Santa list, here is your opportunity to launch into the New Year with the verve and vivacity that is all you…
Strange Crew (and me too) will be playing at the Music Box in Little Italy on Thursday 1/04/24 along with 3 other bands including ZenZag (Reggae Fusion), The Joshua 3 (U2 tribute), and Headmaster (Smiths fans…not impersonators).
So, grab your friends, family (21 and up), neighbors, workmates, frenemies- and come let your hair down.
YOU are in!
I can get you as many complimentary tickets as you like for this killer venue, so don’t be bashful- now is the time to be indulgent and spoil your friends too. This works as a holiday gift that extends into the new year and everyone will appreciate your magnanimous nature.
Simply email me ASAP at nevilleb@missionfed.com re: the number of tickets you want + your mailing address and voila you are on the nice list!
May you all find the time, and may time find you in authentic connection with those that matter most to you, as well as those to whom you may matter mightily in a moment…
Happy Holy Days!
Love,
Neville
The Gift of Time in Aisle 9 “Look at all the sugar in these cereals,” the shrunken, old man pushing 90 said aloud in Aisle 9 at my local drugstore. As he reached for the Cheerios off the shelf, our eyes met.
“I’m down to one teaspoon in my coffee, instead of three. Heck, during WWII I was happy if the coffee was even hot.”
The man, I’d soon come to know as Frank, immediately wiped away a tear with the brush of his jacket sleeve. “I never used to cry, but I seem to cry all the time now.” “That’s healthy,” I replied with a big smile, “it means you’re human.”
Frank returned the smile as he launched into a story about his service buddies. Glancing at the cold milk in my cart and lengthy holiday list in hand, I began to rehearse a graceful exit strategy. After all, I didn’t have a moment to spare. Ready to execute, I turned back towards Frank and got smacked with a feeling. One I didn’t see coming but knew I must honor.
In that awakened moment, I put away my list and said, “Tell me more about WWII.”
Time seemed to stop in Aisle 9 as Frank told me all about his war experience and being part of the largest land battle ever fought by our country – the Battle of the Bulge. “Do you know there were over 70,000 American casualties during that battle alone?” “Yes, I do.” I replied. “My Dad was captured in that Battle and became a Prisoner of War in Stalag 11B.”
Frank’s eyes were alert when I shared the story of how Dad’s frozen feet, rather than being amputated, were saved thanks to the connection he made with a German cook’s young son during his brief hospital stay. The 10-year-old boy, who wanted to learn English, was drawn to my dad’s genuine smile, warmth, and kindness.
Following a day of lessons, he brought Dad a bottle of schnapps to show his appreciation. Dad drank the liquor, massaged his feet all night through the intense pain, and regained enough circulation to prevent the operation the following morning.
Frank chuckled when I shared how Dad ended up playing professional football for the Detroit Lions and Philadelphia Eagles with those same feet!
When the conversation came to a natural close, Frank smiled, put out his hand, pulled me into a hug, and whispered “Thank you for taking time to talk with me.” “It was my pleasure and honor,” I whispered back. And I meant it.
As I held this sweet, dear man in my arms, I could feel his body gently shake as he can no longer hold back tears. My own eyes misted as I felt the power of Dad’s lesson of kindness and warmth play out in my life. This time it wasn’t a little boy and a bottle of schnapps in a war hospital, but an overwhelmed, working mom with a shrunken old man in Aisle 9. But the lesson remained the same. The power of connection through a genuine smile.
The magic in an unexpected place. A moment I almost missed because I didn’t have time to waste. This holiday season, remember the greatest gift you can give another is your presence and time. No wrapping required.
A year into the aging beat, I have found my strength: From a world in a sad state come stories of survival by STEVE LOPEZ
Almost a year ago, as I set out to explore the woes and wonders of aging, I wrote that I didn’t feel as old as the man I saw in the mirror.
That was the truth, and I still feel that way. But as I think back on what I’ve learned over the last 12 months, I need to make a confession. Although I feel younger than my reflection, I’m way older than the impostor whose likeness has been running at the top of this column.
I can’t even recall when that photo of me was taken and transformed into a sketch. Ten years ago, maybe? Most of the hair in that rendering is gone, and the years have carved more lines into my face. It’s false advertising, pure and simple. Here I am, standing firm against ageism in all its forms — in March, I extolled the virtues of actress Mimi Rogers’ vow to age naturally — and yet my miraculous, anti-aging portrait is the equivalent of radical cosmetic surgery. Is there anything that makes you look older than obvious attempts to hide your age?
Not that I was particularly sanguine about anything, including my own age, at the start of 2023. It was the year in which I would turn 70, which does knock you back a bit, especially if you glance now and again at the obituaries. And the world was in a sad state, bearing no resemblance to the picture I’d had in my head as an idealistic and somewhat naive younger man.
Vladimir Putin was attempting to crush Ukraine. The United States was at war with itself. Robots were writing essays. The planet was alternately flooding and burning. And all of that was before the Middle East exploded yet again.
You want to believe, as a parent, that your kids will inhabit a more evolved and less divided world than the one you were born into. So it’s a bit of a letdown to hit 70 and realize time is running out on the chance of sanity breaking out, let alone world peace.
The headline on my inaugural Golden State column asked whether our aging population was an opportunity or a ticking time bomb. We are, after all, approaching the first time in history in which more people in the world will be 65 and older than 18 and under.
The short answer is that while many people will age gracefully and comfortably, maintain access to the best healthcare available and continue finding purpose — in second careers and as volunteers, world travelers, hands-on grandparents and students of reinvention — millions will be swamped by healthcare and housing costs. Millions more will drift into permanent states of loneliness, isolation and the fog of forgotten histories. Countless middle-aged daughters and sons will be financially stressed and spiritually tested as they manage their own lives while caring for children and parents.
And so it goes, as the addled protagonist said over and over again in Kurt Vonnegut’s anti-war novel “Slaughterhouse-Five.” Aging, of course, is nothing new. But the seismic demographic shift is, with 10,000 more people turning 65 each day in the United States, where savage inequities are the norm.
I’m reminded of David Mays, an unemployed Los Angeles caregiver approaching 70, his legs swollen from sleeping in his car for two years, and of the retired downtown L.A. resident who called Skid Row a massive retirement community, with older adults making up one of the fastest-growing segments of the homeless population. The cost of care crippled 102-year-old World War II vet Paul Hult, who told me in his Hollywood apartment that he’d burned through his life savings to pay for in- home help after taking a fall.
And I saw the flip side of that story in the San Fernando Valley, where 71-year-old caregiver Josephine Biclar showed me how she and other women from the Philippines — many of them making less than minimum wage — use dividers to carve apartments into sleeping barracks, because that’s all they can afford.
The challenges are monumental, and even though California is mapping strategies to meet them, questions about long-term funding and leadership abound. As I explore the many implications of an aging population, in California and beyond, it often seems as though I’m witnessing an evolving catastrophe akin to climate change. It’s here. We are not prepared. It’s going to get worse. And yet, as with climate change, there are stories of adaptation and survival, and I felt lucky to be in a position to tell them.
Go where life is and do what replenishes you, Father Gregory Boyle had advised when I was researching “Independence Day,” my book on retirement. My decision to keep working didn’t just replenish me; it helped save me. I lost my first son two years ago — a loss I’m still unable to fathom. Keep moving, I told myself. Find strength in those who honor the departed while moving forward, in those who meet terminal disease with courage and grace.
I recently visited Berkeley poet Charles Entrekin, who has lost his sight and his ability to walk, and he’s now losing his voice as he copes with Parkinson’s. But visits from his grandchildren are like bursts of sunshine, and as long as he can still write, he said, life is worth living. In his newest book, “Poems from the Threshold,” he wrote: I don’t know where I am going, but I am going, even though it is dark. I hold onto the ribbon that will lead me to the next room where I must let go and find my way on my own, alone.
For my 70th birthday, my wife and I went to Ireland. Time itself elasticized on that trip — maybe it stretches thin when you hit a big milestone. I found myself thinking about all the things my son will never experience. I wondered, too, how many more trips I’ll be lucky enough to take and whether, in the time I have left, I should revisit the places I love or take in more of what I’ve never seen. I don’t have the answers, but I know where to find inspiration, thanks to readers who keep sharing their stories with me.
When I watched Benny Wasserman, 88 and in treatment for cancer, hit 90-mile-an-hour fastballs at a batting cage near Disneyland, I cheered his every home run. And I heard from a woman who sits on her porch each morning to watch the rising sun brighten the sea before her, as she studies three new languages and takes her treatment for cancer. I don’t know if I’d have such deep wells of strength in a similar situation, but I’ll know what it means to face fear with courage.
Television pioneer Norman Lear, who died this month at the age of 101, told me three years ago that he dwelt not on what he’d done but on what he wanted to do next. That’s had me thinking lately that if we’re curious about what we don’t know rather than convinced of what we do know, the truth of who we are is unfinished business.
In that regard, I’ve got a new role model, and his name is Pete Teti. On Thanksgiving Day, I accompanied Teti on his daily Griffith Park hike as he approached his 100th birthday. The world is indeed in a sad state, he conceded. But the survivor of the Great Depression and World War II reminded me that things go in cycles, and young people are born without prejudice. So, Teti maintains hope as he indulges his appetite for the new. He’s been studying fractal geometry while producing computer-driven art projects, Exhibit A of the idea that all of us must age, but none of us have to get old. I doubt that I’ll be tackling fractal geometry, although if I’m as lucky as Teti, I’ve got 30 years to change my mind.
I do, however, keep learning new songs on the guitar. And I just got another rescue after losing Dominic, who was named for children’s author William Steig’s story of a dog who feels like he’s stagnating, so he packs his bags and sets out on new adventures. Old dog, new tricks. Why not? Many years ago, when kids would misbehave, I occasionally dragged out an old cliche and told them to act their age.
One year into Golden State, my advice for contemporaries is the exact opposite. Don’t act your age. Don’t even think about it. My biggest regret is that I didn’t, as promised, join a garage band in 2023. Along with an updated photo, that’s on the list of resolutions in the new year.
The Winter Solstice with Billy S: Aloha Friends, The winter solstice was on Thursday, December 21, 2023 at 7:27 pm PST. This begins the winter season. It is a pivot point from which the light will grow stronger and brighter. The longest night and shortest day of the year are followed by a renewal of the sun as days get longer. On this day the sun takes its lowest arc across the sky. On this day the sun sets farthest south on the horizon. Creating a meaningful winter solstice celebration can help us cultivate a deeper connection with nature, family, friends and community.
The winter solstice can be a beautiful reminder that our lives are part of a larger order that’s always changing and renewing. A way to bring warmth, light and cheerfulness into the dark time of the year. For many millenniums humans have marked this sacred time in the yearly cycle of life.
The winter solstice can serve as a touchstone to help us cultivate an attitude of receptiveness and appreciation that will carry us through the holiday season. Reflect on the stillness of the day by cultivating stillness in yourself. Spend more time listening, watching and honoring the slower, quieter rhythm of the season.
Darkness and night are times of rest, dreaming, healing and growth. Seeds must be put into the dark earth in order to send out roots and push up new shoots. Native plants bloom now so that their seeds will be formed and fall to the ground early enough in spring to take advantage of the rains. Plant a seed for a more intuitive, simpler and natural holiday season.
If you want to change something in your life or something about yourself the winter solstice is a good time to work on it. This longest night can be a time of journeying deep into our inner dreamtime to bring forth a dream that can help us in the new year. A new year with fresh possibilities reborn in us all.
The Winter Solstice is: A chance to clean house, both inner and outer. A time for reflection, rest and renewal. A time for feeding the spirit and nurturing the soul. Stay in tune with nature and wellness.
Thanks to Sanya D for The Gift of Time in Aisle 9, to Larry H for A Year into the Aging Beat, and Billy S for the Winter Solstice missive!
Have a blessed holiday season and please pay it forward… Love, Neville
Steep physical decline isn’t inevitable. This type of exercise can change the trajectory of aging, one expert says Prioritizing physical fitness and health as you age can help you go through your normal day-to-day routine without feeling physically exhausted at the end of the day.
These Personality Traits Can Lower Your Risk of Dementia New research has found that people who have the Big Five personality traits of conscientiousness and positive affect are less likely to be diagnosed with dementia. People with traits like neuroticism and negative affect may be more likely to have a higher risk of dementia. Experts recommend adopting the positive behaviors of conscientious people, like eating nutritiously, exercising, and taking care of your health, to help reduce your long-term risk of dementia.
Happy Soul Food Friday! 