The Power of Thank You and If You are Local- a Live Aid type event this Friday
THE POWER OF THANK YOU
Thank You, two words that have the power to transform our health, happiness, athletic performance, and success. Research shows that grateful people are happier and more likely to maintain good friendships. A state of gratitude, according to research by the Institute of HeartMath, also improves the heart’s rhythmic functioning, which helps us to reduce stress, think more clearly under pressure and heal physically. It’s physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time. When you are grateful you flood your body and brain with emotions and endorphins that uplift and energize you rather than the stress hormones that drain you.
Gratitude and appreciation are also essential for a healthy work environment. In fact, the number one reason why people leave their jobs is because they don’t feel appreciated. A simple thank you and a show of appreciation can make all the difference. Gratitude is like muscle. The more we do with it the stronger it gets.
In this spirit here are 5 ways to practice Thanksgiving every day of the year. 1) Take a Daily Thank You Walk – Take a simple 10-30 minute walk each day and say out loud what you are thankful for. This will set you up for a positive day. 2) Mealtime Thank You’s – On Thanksgiving, or just at dinner go around the table and have each person, including the kids, say what they are thankful for. 3) Gratitude Visit – Martin Seligman, Ph.D., the father of positive psychology, suggests that we write a letter expressing our gratitude to someone. Then we visit this person and read them the letter. His research shows that people who do this are measurably happier and less depressed a month later. 4) Say Thank You at Work – When Doug Conant was the CEO of Campbell Soup, he wrote approximately 30,000 thank you notes to his employees and energized the company in the process. Energize and engage your co-workers and team by letting them know you are grateful for them and their work. Organizations spend billions of dollars collectively on recognition programs but the best and cheapest recognition program of all consists of a sincere THANK YOU. And of course, don’t forget to say thank you to your clients and customers too.
5) Say Thank you and Goodnight – At bedtime reflect on your day, identify, and share all that you are thankful for.
If You are Local- Gig Alert for this Friday Nov 28: Strange Crew is Opening this Live Aid Band Aid Style Event at The Observatory in North Park San Diego at 6:30pm SHARP!
Hi Live Music Mavens!
Are you going to need to work off your Thanksgiving meal and spread a little joy? This Friday, Strange Crew will represent the Clapton Era at this all-age tribute band and holiday food drive experience at The Observatory!
We are opening for Rolling Stones, U2 and Queen tribute bands with a Live Aid themed event to foster generosity this holiday season. Doors open at 6pm and we go on at 6:30 sharp, with a 45-minute set, so don’t be late!
There is a food drive too so bring a can or two, for those less fortunate than us. Tickets are $25, but if you let me know you are coming, how many tickets you need, and ideally the names of the attendees (helpful but not mission critical) I can get you in for FREE! Please let me know ASAP and no later than Friday morning, so I can put you and yours on the guest list. Invite your friends too as the more the merrier and more food for our struggling neighbors. Love, Neville
“I’m a liberal, but that doesn’t mean what a lot of you apparently think it does. Let’s break it down, shall we? Because quite frankly, I’m getting a little tired of being told what I believe and what I stand for. Spoiler alert: not every liberal is the same, though the majority of liberals I know think along roughly these same lines:
1. I believe a country should take care of its weakest members. A country cannot call itself civilized when its children, disabled, sick, and elderly are neglected. PERIOD.
2. I believe healthcare is a right, not a privilege. Somehow that’s interpreted as “I believe Obamacare is the end-all, be-all.” This is not the case. I’m fully aware that the ACA has problems, that a national healthcare system would require everyone to chip in, and that it’s impossible to create one that is devoid of flaws, but I have yet to hear an argument against it that makes “let people die because they can’t afford healthcare” a better alternative. I believe healthcare should be far cheaper than it is, and that everyone should have access to it. And no, I’m not opposed to paying higher taxes in the name of making that happen.
3. I believe education should be affordable. It doesn’t necessarily have to be free (though it works in other countries so I’m mystified as to why it can’t work in the US), but at the end of the day, there is no excuse for students graduating college saddled with five- or six-figure debt.
4. I don’t believe your money should be taken from you and given to people who don’t want to work. I have literally never encountered anyone who believes this. Ever. I just have a massive moral problem with a society where a handful of people can possess the majority of the wealth while there are people literally starving to death, freezing to death, or dying because they can’t afford to go to the doctor. Fair wages, lower housing costs, universal healthcare, affordable education, and the wealthy actually paying their share would go a long way toward alleviating this. Somehow believing that makes me a communist.
5. I don’t throw around “I’m willing to pay higher taxes” lightly. If I’m suggesting something that involves paying more, well, it’s because I’m fine with paying my share as long as it’s actually going to something besides lining corporate pockets or bombing other countries while Americans die without healthcare.
6. I believe companies should be required to pay their employees a decent, livable wage. Somehow this is always interpreted as me wanting burger flippers to be able to afford a penthouse apartment and a Mercedes. What it actually means is that no one should have to work three full-time jobs just to keep their head above water. Restaurant servers should not have to rely on tips, multibillion-dollar companies should not have employees on food stamps, workers shouldn’t have to work themselves into the ground just to barely make ends meet, and minimum wage should be enough for someone to work 40 hours and live.
7. I am not anti-Christian. I have no desire to stop Christians from being Christians, to close churches, to ban the Bible, to forbid prayer in school, etc. (BTW, prayer in school is NOT illegal; *compulsory* prayer in school is – and should be – illegal). All I ask is that Christians recognize *my* right to live according to *my* beliefs. When I get pissed off that a politician is trying to legislate Scripture into law, I’m not “offended by Christianity” — I’m offended that you’re trying to force me to live by your religion’s rules. You know how you get really upset at the thought of Muslims imposing Sharia law on you? That’s how I feel about Christians trying to impose biblical law on me. Be a Christian. Do your thing. Just don’t force it on me or mine.
8. I don’t believe LGBT people should have more rights than you. I just believe they should have the *same* rights as you.
9. I don’t believe illegal immigrants should come to America and have the world at their feet, especially since THIS ISN’T WHAT THEY DO (spoiler: undocumented immigrants are ineligible for all those programs they’re supposed to be abusing, and if they’re “stealing” your job it’s because your employer is hiring illegally). I believe there are far more humane ways to handle undocumented immigration than our current practices (i.e., detaining children, splitting up families, ending DACA, etc.).
10. I don’t believe the government should regulate everything, but since greed is such a driving force in our country, we NEED regulations to prevent cut corners, environmental destruction, tainted food/water, unsafe materials in consumable goods or medical equipment, etc. It’s not that I want the government’s hands in everything — I just don’t trust people trying to make money to ensure that their products/practices/etc. are actually SAFE. Is the government devoid of shadiness? Of course not. But with those regulations in place, consumers have recourse if they’re harmed and companies are liable for medical bills, environmental cleanup, etc. Just kind of seems like common sense when the alternative to government regulation is letting companies bring their bottom line into the equation.
11. I believe our current administration is fascist. Not because I dislike them or because I can’t get over an election, but because I’ve spent too many years reading and learning about the Third Reich to miss the similarities. Not because any administration I dislike must be Nazis, but because things are actually mirroring authoritarian and fascist regimes of the past.
12. I believe the systemic racism and misogyny in our society is much worse than many people think and desperately needs to be addressed. Which means those with privilege — white, straight, male, economic, etc. — need to start listening, even if you don’t like what you’re hearing, so we can start dismantling everything that’s causing people to be marginalized.
13. I am not interested in coming after your blessed guns, nor is anyone serving in government. What I am interested in is the enforcement of present laws and enacting new, common sense gun regulations. Got another opinion? Put it on your page, not mine.
14. I believe in so-called political correctness. I prefer to think it’s social politeness. If I call you Chuck and you say you prefer to be called Charles, I’ll call you Charles. It’s the polite thing to do. Not because everyone is a delicate snowflake, but because as Maya Angelou put it, when we know better, we do better. When someone tells you that a term or phrase is more accurate/less hurtful than the one you’re using, you now know better. So why not do better? How does it hurt you to NOT hurt another person?
15. I believe in funding sustainable energy, including offering education to people currently working in coal or oil so they can change jobs. There are too many sustainable options available for us to continue with coal and oil. Sorry, billionaires. Maybe try investing in something else.
16. I believe that women should not be treated as a separate class of human. They should be paid the same as men who do the same work, should have the same rights as men and should be free from abuse. Why on earth shouldn’t they be?
I think that about covers it. Bottom line is that I’m a liberal because I think we should take care of each other. That doesn’t mean you should work 80 hours a week so your lazy neighbor can get all your money. It just means I don’t believe there is any scenario in which preventable suffering is an acceptable outcome as long as money is saved.”
Ron Howard
James Talarico Delivers Sermon Against Christian Nationalism:
A powerful sermon that remains true now more than even though it was shared two years ago…
“Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see.”
-John W. Whitehead
If you could use some Self Care- Take Care of Yourself and Take Care of Others!
On Wednesday September 3rd from Noon to 1pm with NCPC and San Diego Gives; I am running a self-care webinar.
Small Things Often:Micro Habits that Foster Macro Competencies
An authentic embodied great reset- in self-compassion and self-care- for conscious leaders and culture transformers
Even the heart pumps blood to itself first. As leaders and practitioners, we often invest substantial energy in serving others, and as a result don’t always attend to our own needs. Here is an opportunity to provide you, and by extension those in your community, with simple and proven energetic techniques- supported by both western science and eastern wisdom traditions- that reduce chronic stress and upskill resilience and fortitude, particularly in times of challenge and uncertainty.
What you may not know about Me:
The wellness of business. The business of wellness.
Neville who was born in India and has invested his lifetime in bridging the east/west divide and synergizing the best of both cultures, brings over 40 years of practicing and teaching the wisdom traditions, including traditional martial arts, yoga, and meditation to this session.
He has been applying these principles in the world of work with conscious leaders as well as deep purpose driven cultures that value all stakeholders in the ecosystem, and are committed to wellness, wholeness, and purpose not just profit. This includes leading and coaching businesses, nonprofit organizations, as well as K-12 and institutions of higher education, while serving in his executive role at Mission Fed. Additionally, he serves on a variety of boards and volunteers his time to uplift those furthest from opportunity in our San Diego community.
Neville, and NCPC are honored to bring these micro habits to the San Diego community with “Small things often!”
If you are interested, please register here and you can get the recording even if you can’t make the actual event and do share with your network please!
The little boy came to our table of leather-clad bikers and slammed down a paper that said, “DADDY’S FUNERAL – NEED SCARY MEN.”
His tiny fingers were still stained with marker ink, and his Superman cape was on backwards. The diner went dead silent as fifteen members of the Iron Wolves MC stared at this kid who couldn’t have weighed forty pounds soaking wet.
“My mom said I can’t ask you,” he announced, his chin jutting out defiantly. “But she’s crying all the time and the mean boys at school said daddy won’t go to heaven without scary men to protect him.”
Big Tom, who’d done two tours in Afghanistan and had a skull tattooed on his neck, carefully picked up the paper. It was a child’s drawing of stick figures on motorcycles surrounding a coffin, with “PLEASE COME” written in backwards letters.
“Where’s your mom, little man?” Tom asked, his voice a low rumble that usually preceded a fight but was now impossibly gentle.
The boy pointed through the window to a beat-up Toyota where a young woman sat with her head in her hands. “She’s scared of you. Everyone’s scared of you. That’s why I need you.”
I’d seen Tom break a man’s jaw for disrespecting his bike. But his hands shook as he read what else was on that paper – a date, tomorrow, and an address for Riverside Cemetery.
“What was your daddy’s name?” someone asked from the back.
“Officer Marcus Rivera,” the boy said proudly. “He was a police officer. A bad man shot him.”
The silence in the diner got heavier, thick enough to choke on. Cops and bikers weren’t exactly natural allies. Most of us had been hassled, profiled, some even beaten by police. And now this cop’s kid was asking us to honor his fallen father.
Tom stood up slowly, his towering frame casting a shadow over the small table. “What’s your name, superman?”
“Miguel. Miguel Rivera.”
“Well, Miguel Rivera,” Tom said, kneeling so he was eye to eye with the boy, a giant meeting a sparrow. “You tell your mom that your daddy’s going to have the biggest, loudest, scariest escort to heaven any police officer ever had.”
The boy’s eyes went wide. “Really? You’ll come?”
“Brother,” Snake spoke up from the corner, and I could hear the conflict in his voice. “He was a cop.”
“He was a father,” Tom said firmly, his gaze never leaving Miguel’s. “And this little warrior just did the bravest thing I’ve seen all year. We ride.”
The next morning, I arrived at the cemetery two hours early. I thought I’d be the only one, a chance to get my head right before the awkwardness and the stares. But then my jaw dropped.
The narrow road leading to the cemetery entrance was already lined with bikes. Not just the fifteen of us from the diner, but our entire chapter. Forty men, standing quietly by their polished Harleys, the morning sun glinting off the chrome. But that wasn’t what stopped my heart. Further down the road, another group was pulling in. The Vipers. Our bitter rivals. And behind them, the Sons of Odin. Word had gotten out. A call had been made for scary men, and the entire goddamn scary underworld had answered.
When the funeral procession finally arrived, the hearse slowed to a stop. I saw Miguel in the car behind it, his small face pressed against the glass. His mother looked up, and her hand flew to her mouth, her expression of fear melting into stunned disbelief.
There were over a hundred of us. A silent army of leather and steel.
At some unseen signal from Tom, a hundred engines roared to life at the exact same instant. The sound was biblical. It wasn’t angry or aggressive; it was a deep, thundering proclamation. We are here. We formed a double line, a guard of honor for the hearse and the family and escorted them through the gates.
At the graveside, a small group of uniformed officers stood stiffly, their honor guard looking tense as we dismounted. They watched us, we watched them. But there was no trouble. We formed a wide, silent circle around the service, our backs to the family, facing outward. We were a wall, protecting their grief from the world.
After the service, as the last of the mourners were leaving, the police chief walked over to Big Tom. He was a hard-looking man I’d seen on the news a dozen times. He stopped, looked at Tom, then at the sea of bikers standing in silent respect.
“I… I don’t have the words,” the chief said, his voice rough. “Officer Rivera was a good man.”
Tom just gave a short, sharp nod. “He had a good son.”
That’s when I saw Miguel, holding his mother’s hand, walking purposefully toward us. He stopped in front of Tom, who immediately knelt again. Miguel wasn’t wearing his cape anymore. He was holding the folded American flag from his father’s coffin.
He held it out. “This is for you,” he said, his voice clear and steady.
Tom gently pushed it back. “No, little man. That’s yours. That’s your daddy’s.”
“My daddy was a hero,” Miguel said, pushing the flag firmly into Tom’s huge, tattooed hand. “He protected people. And today, you protected him.”
Tom stared at the flag in his hand, his jaw working, his whole-body trembling. The man I’d seen walk through a bar fight without flinching was completely undone by a forty-pound superhero. He couldn’t speak. He just nodded, his eyes shining with tears he refused to let fall.
We didn’t ride away with a roar. We left one by one, a quiet rumble that spoke of a respect that went deeper than clubs or colors or the badges on a uniform. We had come because a little boy asked for scary men. But we left knowing we’d just met the bravest one of all.
“Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent.”- Carl Jung
I’ve studied hundreds of highly successful kids—the No. 1 thing their parents teach early: Parenting expert Jennifer Breheny Wallace has spent six years studying hundreds of high-achieving kids. Here’s why she says a “mattering mindset” is the secret to their success, and how parents can cultivate it from a young age.
“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.” – Nelson Mandela
How 9 minutes of daily HIIT may improve kids’ brain function and learning, according to research Researchers say nine minutes of exercise may be enough to boost children’s mood and cognitive skills.
“Perhaps the immutable error of parenthood is that we give our children what we wanted, whether they want it or not.
We heal our wounds with the love we wish we’d received, but are often blind to the wounds we inflict.” ― Andrew Solomon
+ A feel good vid
Lion Seeks Forgiveness from Dog Best Friend in Heartwarming Gesture That Gains 30M Views Friendships in the animal world can be full of surprises, especially when they involve a lion and a dog. While lions are often seen as fierce predators, sometimes they form bonds that defy all expectations.
“The thing the church needs most today is the ability to heal wounds and to warm the hearts of the faithful; it needs nearness, proximity.
I see the church as a field hospital after battle.
It is useless to ask a seriously injured person if he has high cholesterol and about the level of his blood sugars!
You have to heal his wounds.
Then we can talk about everything else.
Heal the wounds, heal the wounds. …
And you have to start from the ground up.”
-Pope Francis
The Pope’s Hope courtesy of Ryan Berman: Pope Francis passed away last week at the age of 88. While I didn’t study Pope Francis “religiously”, my brilliant co-author of a new book I have coming out in September (Headamentals), Suzy Burke, had shared the following with me and it stopped me in my tracks…
I share his profound wisdom below:
“The walls of hospitals have heard more honest prayers than churches… They have witnessed far more sincere kisses than those in airports…
It is in hospitals that you see a homophobe being saved by a gay doctor.
A privileged doctor saving the life of a beggar…
In intensive care, you see a Jew taking care of a racist…
A police officer and a prisoner in the same room receiving the same care…
A wealthy patient waiting for a liver transplant, ready to receive the organ from a poor donor…
It is in these moments, when the hospital touches the wounds of people, that different worlds intersect according to a divine design.
And in this communion of destinies, we realize that alone, we are nothing.
The absolute truth of people, most of the time, only reveals itself in moments of pain or in the real threat of an irreversible loss.
A hospital is a place where human beings remove their masks and show themselves as they truly are, in their purest essence.
This life will pass quickly, so do not waste it fighting with people.
Do not criticize your body too much.
Do not complain excessively.
Do not lose sleep over bills.
Make sure to hug your loved ones.
Do not worry too much about keeping the house spotless.
Material goods must be earned by each person—do not dedicate yourself to accumulating an inheritance.
You are waiting for too much: Christmas, Friday, next year, when you have money, when love arrives, when everything is perfect…
Listen, perfection does not exist.
A human being cannot attain it because we are simply not made to be fulfilled here.
Here, we are given an opportunity to learn.
So, make the most of this trial of life—and do it now.
Respect yourself, respect others. Walk your own path and let go of the path others have chosen for you.
Respect: do not comment, do not judge, do not interfere.
Love more, forgive more, embrace more, live more intensely!
And leave the rest in the hands of the Creator.”
—Pope Francis
You Don’t Have to Be the Pope, to Make a Difference of Consequence:
My dear friend Dr. Ken Druck, a highly sought after Mental Health Expert and Mensch, shares his insights, with Drew and me on How to Survive Tragic Losses and How to Cultivate Hope, Meaning, Loving Kindness, Joy, and Compassion.
Pope Francis’ Greatest Achievement Was Emphasizing Mercy: Pope Francis true legacy will be his emphasis on mercy, which he believed would create a Church in ‘God’s style.’
Megaphone Hand, business concept with text Attention Please, vector illustration
Why Do We Dehumanize Ourselves by Being Tone Deaf to the Plight of the Needy and Those That Can’t Speak for Themselves?
Pope Francis Focused on Climate Change as the Planet continued to get Hotter:
The patron saint of animals and ecology brought together science, morality and faith and prompted people across the globe to pay attention to what is happening as the planet continues to heat up!
Why a transformative leader is a protector not an antagonist…
Plants ‘Scream’ When They’re Cut, We Just Couldn’t Hear It. Until Now… For centuries, humans have viewed plants as stoic, green stalwarts of nature, keeping to themselves unless a gentle breeze made them rustle.
According to research, they’ve actually been making sounds this whole time, we’ve just been too hard of hearing to notice.
Elephants form “alert circle” during earthquake at San Diego Zoo Safari Park African Elephants at the San Diego Zoo Safari Park instinctively created an “alert circle” during the earthquake some weeks back.
Even wild animals circle the wagons to protect the vulnerable.
YouTube launched 20 years ago with an 18-second video at the San Diego Zoo That’s the title of one of the most consequential videos of all time. The video to start all videos. The “Big Bang” of the video-sharing world.
These are some of the best animal, people and panorama photos in the world! This incredible golden heron leads the winning images of Picture Award’s 17th edition, centered around animals, people and panoramas
It doesn’t mean you should turn off the news — which I have a tendency to do. We should also stay informed.
Know what’s going; on but don’t let politics, the news or the current stock market sink your psyche.
This doesn’t mean to be tone deaf or to turn the other cheek. It means stay even, stay civil, and shoot your shots if it’s aligned with your values.
Want to protest? Do it. Want to use this teaching opportunity for your kids? Do it. Want to reach out to someone on the other side to understand their POV? Do it.
We all lose when we lose ourselves in the chaos. We all lose when we’re humanrude, humanharsh or humancruel.
How will you show up? Why will you show up? Where will you show up?
If and when you do… stay humankind.
Jason Mraz- My Kind:
This song will lift you up and bolster your spirits!
Confucius had it right when he advised “before you go off to seek revenge it’s best to dig two graves.” Getting brilliant at forgiving those who have wronged and hurt you delivers these benefits to you as a leader, producer, and person:
—you avoid becoming a resentment collector, full of negativity and cynicism.
—you protect the energy needed to get big things done.
—you live in the present and pursue a richer future rather than staying stuck in the past.
—you free up a ton of creativity that would be consumed grumbling about what someone did to you.
—you remain peaceful and helpful instead of obsessing about being mistreated.
A few of the forgiveness rules that have been super useful to the clients I mentor:
1.Forgiveness isn’t condoning the behavior. No. It’s more about understanding that everyone does the best we can based on how we think. And, as Maya Angelou observed: “If they knew better, they would have done better.” How they behaved made sense to them at the time (read that twice), even if their actions were foolish and hurtful. So, practice the master skill of letting go.
2. Let success be your confident reply. Staying bitter and stagnant is a violent defeat. What I suggest is to try and use what someone did to you as soil for your growth and fuel for your winning. Let any pain you suffer actually purify you by processing through it so that you become emotionally richer, internally stronger, and personally wiser. And, as best as you can, exploit this newfound clarity, creativity, and maturity to build glorious fortunes of success, beauty, and inner freedom. Let an even more beautiful life be your elegant response.
3. What’s yours can’t be taken from you. Mom taught me this one and I wrote about the lesson in-depth in my latest book The Wealth Money Can’t Buy. What she taught me is that what’s meant for me can’t be taken from me and if something didn’t work out the way I wished it would have, it just wasn’t meant to be. Allow people to be on their own path and know that what unfolds for them is none of your business. Do your best and trust—with deep faith—that life has your back. And that what appears is always for your fortune, never for your failure.
4. Keep Death Close [KDC]. Reflecting on how short life really is and the fact that in 100 years, everyone alive today will be dust will give you perspective. A mistreatment that seems so big will begin to look small. You’ll see the value of moving on and letting the hurter deal with their karma. And you’ll be energized to “stick to your knitting” by doing what you know to be right, making excellent daily progress and remembering that good things inevitably happen to people who do great things.
Pets increase life satisfaction as much as marriage or close friendships: In a world where happiness often feels like a moving target, we constantly seek what brings true contentment.
People turn to careers, families, friendships, pets, and even meditation or travel in the hope of feeling joy and fulfillment in life.
A crow’s math skills include geometry: Crows in a lab were able to distinguish shapes that exhibited right angles, parallel lines, and symmetry, suggesting that, like humans, they have a special ability to perceive geometric regularity.
Missing toddler who walked 7 miles through Arizona wilderness led to safety by a dog: The rancher traced the boy’s steps and discovered that Buford, an Anatolian Pyrenees who normally patrols his land and wards off coyotes, had escorted the 2-year-old for at least a mile.
Confront the Brutal Facts but Always Maintain Hope!
Heads Up!
The first part of this week’s missive is political and personal so if you don’t have the stomach for it, I completely understand, just skip to the second part which is a reminder to celebrate the women in our lives.
No bystanding!
Love,
Neville
In Germany, they came first for the Communists, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Communist. And then they came for the trade unionists, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a trade unionist. And then they came for the Jews, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Jew. And then… they came for me… And by that time there was no one left to speak up. –Rev Martin Niemoller, January 1946
As a peaceful warrior, I generally try to model discretion over valor, but this week I am done sitting on the sidelines, and if that means I am “offsides” and “offend” then so be it.
Divisiveness is not my aim, but unless you are a member of the 1st world nations you like me are an immigrant, and we are stronger because of our diversity not because of white supremacy or other narratives that are not reflective of this nation’s history and vibrancy.
Systemic racism, white colonialism and revisionist history will not save this country or planet, no matter how hard to try to hide in its cloaks and daggers.
The greater the hiding, the greater the self-revelation…
If you are torqued by this week’s Soul Food Friday missive, apologies as for more than 15 years, my goal, purpose and aim was to bring some positivity to what seemed like a environment that privileged sensationalism, negativity and polarization, but if I freak you out today, I think it is best that you simply skip, so I don’t trigger you further.
You deserve statis and peace.
Regardless, at least you will know where I stand at this generational crisis which will inevitably have long term implications for those that follow including your kids and grandkids.
More likes are definitely not my metric of success.
While tough to swallow, I am totally cool with being unliked if I am doing the right thing in support and service of others that can’t always be at the table for themselves. Being liked is a social crutch I would prefer to set aside and walk or hobble on my own two feet.
Likes and FOMO have completely messed up the entire “anxious generation” as we post all our bull$#!+ pics of our best selves, living our fabricated and often phony best lives -sometimes with the help of a professional photographer capturing the best shots of an idealized experience that simply does not exist- once we step into your living room and watch you interact with your friends and family.
Alternatively, if you are pumped, jacked, mobilized, emboldened, want to act but don’t know what to do, care deeply but are concerned about downstream consequences and threats, please don’t waste this crisis and let’s make sure your voice is heard.
Do hold space and grace by serving as an ally- no bystanding- human up!- for those who can’t raise their voices for fear of retaliation, targeting, or suffering indignities on top of immense suffering on an unlevel playing field, where social mobility is no longer available to all, and where purported “leaders” would rather kiss Nero’s ring than fess up to the reality that the US is burning and good people stand idly by while the rule of law is threatened, separation of powers is sidelined, the rich get richer on the backs of the poor and middle class, and power corrupts, while absolute power corrupts absolutely!.
Enough is enough…
Can you feel it?
My soul is stirred and meeting the moment this week means speaking truth to power, justice and mercy to cruelty, sanity to inanity, and being present with what is bereft due to social hypnosis, perseverating on risk of loss, or other rationalizations that keep us on the sideline while democracy devolves in front of our eyes.
But that is being nice…
It is time for ME to take a stand. (how about you?)
I know that some of my relatives, friends, neighbors, co-workers, associates, and fellow Americans may unfriend me and that would be unfortunate, but I can’t stay quiet!
It is too important.
This is where I stand.
The 47th President, his power-hungry cronies taking positions of authority in his Cabinet and administration, and the majority of Republicans in Congress are a real and active threat to me, my way of life, and all or most of the people I love.
Some people are saying that we should give Trump a chance, that we should “work together” with him because he won the election, and he is “everyone’s president.”
This is my response:
•I will not forget how badly he and so many others treated former President Barack Obama for 8 years…Lies about his legitimacy and hatred for his principles and his attempts to work within the system.
•I will not “work together” to privatize Medicare, cut Social Security and Medicaid.
•I will not “work together” to subvert the Constitution by illegitimately pushing unfit Cabinet nominees through on recess appointments without the advice and consent of the Senate.
•I will not “work together” to build a wall.
•I will not “work together” to persecute Muslims.
•I will not “work together” to shut out refugees from other countries.
•I will not “work together” to lower taxes on the 1% and increase taxes on the middle class and poor.
•I will not “work together” to help Trump use the Presidency to line his pockets and those of his family and cronies.
•I will not “work together” to weaken and demolish environmental protection.
•I will not “work together” to sell American lands, especially National Parks, to companies which then despoil those lands.
•I will not “work together” to enable the killing of whole species of animals just because they are predators, or inconvenient for a few, or because some people want to get their thrills killing them.
•I will not “work together” to remove civil rights from anyone.
•I will not “work together” to alienate countries that have been our allies for as long as I have been alive.
•I will not “work together” to slash funding for education.
•I will not “work together” to take basic assistance from people who are at the bottom of the socioeconomic ladder.
•I will not “work together” to get rid of common-sense regulations on guns.
•I will not “work together” to eliminate the minimum wage.
•I will not “work together” to support so-called “Right To Work” laws, or undermine, weaken or destroy Unions in any way.
•I will not “work together” to suppress scientific research, be it on climate change, fracking, or any other issue where a majority of scientists agree that Trump and his supporters are wrong on the facts.
•I will not “work together” to criminalize abortion or restrict health care for women.
•I will not “work together” to increase the number of nations that have nuclear weapons.
•I will not “work together” to put even more “big money” into politics.
•I will not “work together” to violate the Geneva Convention.
•I will not “work together” to give the Ku Klux Klan, the Nazi Party and white supremacists a seat at the table, or to normalize their hatred.
•I will not “work together” to deny health care to people who need it.
•I will not “work together” to deny medical coverage to people on the basis of a “pre-existing condition.”
•I will not “work together” to increase voter suppression.
•I will not “work together” to normalize tyranny.
•I will not “work together” to eliminate or reduce ethical oversight at any level of government.
•I will not “work together” with anyone who is, or admires, tyrants and dictators.
•I will not support anyone that thinks it’s OK to put a pipeline to transport oil on Sacred Ground for Native Americans. And, it would run under the Missouri River, which provides drinking water for millions of people. An accident waiting to happen.
•I will not “work together” to legitimize racism, sexism, and authoritarianism.
This is my line, and I am drawing it.
•I WILL stand for honesty, love, respect for all living beings, and for the beating heart that is the center of Life itself.
•I WILL use my voice and my hands, to reach out to the uninformed, and to anyone who will LISTEN:
That “winning”, “being great again”, “rich” or even “beautiful” is nothing… When others are sacrificed to glorify its existence.
I am joining my fellow Americans in this noble and honorable expression of conscience, conviction, justice, morality, faith, commitment, democracy, and informed patriotism.
Zero pressure, but if you agree, it is your turn.
Copy, paste into your email and/or preferred social media platform, add your name to the top and launch a chain.
“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor” – Archbishop Desmond Tutu:
“Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow.
The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
The Entire World Is Pissed at Trump-and It May Cost the U.S. Big Time Donald Trump’s tariffs aren’t the only thing that will wreck the U.S. economy.
Trump’s regime is fated to collapse: Despite its chest-beating rhetoric, the Trump regime is actually brittle and fated to ineffectiveness, collapse or both.
It’s Time to Ditch the Term DEI We can’t debate its merits when we don’t agree on what it means. On President Donald Trump’s first day back in the White House, he issued an executive order ending diversity, equity, and inclusion in the federal government. Its sweeping language forbids DEI “mandates, policies, programs, preferences, and activities,” and orders the termination of all DEI positions—hundreds if not thousands of roles.
Trump’s FBI Moves to Criminally Charge Major Climate Groups The Trump administration is targeting climate organizations that received a Biden-era grant.
Trump cuts to NOAA already felt in San Diego Cuts to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration affect research and sea monitoring partnerships between NOAA and Scripps Institution of Oceanography.
Banned Articles? Did you know that NOAA recently released a new Climate Literacy Guide? This incredible resource aims to help communicators and decision-makers develop their understanding of climate change—but it was recently scrubbed from their website, severely minimizing its impact and reach. You can at least learn about it here.
Trump’s Assault on Universities Is a Wake-Up Call American higher education would be in a much stronger position today if it had made a proactive case to the public for its own importance—and taken steps to address its very real shortcomings.
Chaos on campuses as schools warn Trump cuts could harm US ‘for decades’ President’s slashes to higher education institutions and research funding threaten US public health
Education Department to slash half its workforce “Employees will not be permitted in any ED facility on Wednesday, March 12th, for any reason,” a message to agency staff Tuesday stated.
“Science is under attack”: Hundreds rally at UC San Diego to protest DOGE cuts From Social Security to the IRS, federal budget cuts under the Trump administration are being felt everywhere. On Friday, the focus turned to science—nationwide and at UC San Diego.
Want to Help Fight ICE Raids? There’s a Map for That. This group has developed a new app to help keep everyone one step ahead of Donald Trump’s deportation schemes
Forwarded this email? Subscribe here for more A Mind is a Terrible Thing to Lose Especially when you’re running a country Paul Krugman Mar 12 A note to subscribers: I’ve taken my weekend primer on Social Security out from behind the paywall, partly in response to popular demand but also because it’s relevant to today’s post. This will, I hope, be a fairly short post. That’s partly because my schedule is really tight at the moment and I don’t have time for detailed analysis. But it’s also because I don’t want too much analysis to clutter up a very simple point: The two most powerful men in America have gone stark raving mad. I don’t say this because I disagree with their ideologies or believe that they have very bad policy ideas. That’s been true for quite a few politicians over the years. But while I’ve always considered, say, Mitch McConnell a malign influence on America, while I described Paul Ryan as a flimflam man, I never questioned their sanity. And yes, I’m well aware of the dangers involved in questioning people’s mental stability from afar, especially in a political context. I personally have been the target of that sort of thing, back when people accused me of being unhinged for suggesting that the Bush administration was taking us to war on false pretenses. But I don’t see how you can look at recent statements by Donald Trump and Elon Musk without concluding that both men have lost their grip on reality. News reports still tend to sanewash what our leaders have been saying, and even selected quotations often make them sound more rational than they are. Fortunately, both are addicted to posting on social media, and you really have to read some of their posts to get a full sense of the madness. So here’s Trump, ranting against Canada: Leave aside the nonsensical claims that Canada is a high-tariff nation subsidized by the United States. When Trump first began talking about turning Canada into the 51st state, many people treated it as a joke. But Trump doesn’t appear to be in on the joke. He just keeps doubling down, even as the people of Canada grow ever more outraged. No sane leader would imagine that it’s a good idea to threaten a heretofore friendly but proudly patriotic neighbor and ally with annexation. But a sane leader is exactly what we don’t have. Then there’s Elon Musk. Surely almost everyone except Trump realizes that DOGE has been a bust; despite unprecedented and often illegal access to government agencies, it has yet to come up with any credible major examples of waste or fraud. Even Musk, I suspect, knows at some level that he’s failing. But like Trump on Canada, he just keeps doubling down. Consider Musk’s quickly and easily refuted claim that tens of millions of dead people are receiving Social Security checks. This was a deeply embarrassing error, one that would have killed most people’s political careers. Still, Musk might have been able to ride it out by admitting that his minions had failed to understand the Social Security Administration’s databases. But no. Musk has reiterated his claim that we’re making huge payments to dead people, and is now insisting that Social Security is a Ponzi scheme, showing that he hasn’t made any effort to understand how the bedrock of American retirement works. Musk’s obsession with supposed fraud in Social Security is looking a lot like Trump’s obsession with annexing Canada; apparently he simply can’t admit error, even to himself, and change course. And then there’s this: Of course, illegal immigrants don’t receive Social Security benefits, because they don’t have valid Social Security numbers. But that’s almost trivial compared with Musk’s open endorsement of the Great Replacement conspiracy theory, according to which liberals are deliberately luring nonwhite immigrants to America to tilt the electorate in their favor. This is the conspiracy theory that inspired torch-carrying marchers in Charlottesville to chant “Jews will not replace us.” And look beyond what Trump and Musk have said to the actions of the people they’ve chosen to oversee key public agencies. Robert F. Kennedy, the secretary of health and human services, refuses to respond to a measles outbreak with a clear call for vaccinations, instead suggesting that people take cod liver oil. The secretary of agriculture has suggested that Americans respond to high egg prices by raising their own chickens. How did the highest levels of U.S. government become infected by madness? Well, this is what you get when you give flawed people — people prone to grandiosity, vindictiveness and paranoia — so much power that nobody dares tell them when they’re going too far. Cowed Republicans and timid Democrats have effectively given Trump and Musk the freedom to become the worst versions of themselves. And the whole world will pay the price.
Happy International Women’s Day. Here are the best female composers of all time Our guide to the best female composers from history, many of whom have historically been wrongly excluded from the canon. Let’s put that right – get to know their music now!
Let’s meet the moment, to our own selves be true, and be active agents of democracy and uplifting humanity, not passive victims of a system that serves the few on the backs of many.
It is time to show up. NOW!
Thanks this week to Ken D for the spark, Chris B for some links, Charles B for reminding me its ok to be disliked and you for speaking truth to power!
Love,
Neville
“Remember that all through history, there have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they seem invincible.
7 Pieces of Advice to Spark Some Inspiration for the New Year
To succeed in 2025, a therapist says do 5 things: It works ‘any time of year’
44 health-boosting habits to feel better in 2025
+ What Happens To Their Brain Waves When Humans And Dogs Connect?
Closing Out 2024:
77 Facts That Blew Our Minds in 2024: Chewing gum, space capsules, and minivans are just a few of the things we see differently after a year of reporting. December 28, 2024 Onions were used to treat wounds during the French and Indian War. The energy required to show a new Instagram post from Cristiano Ronaldo to each of his followers could power a house for several years. A group of butterflies flew across the Atlantic Ocean without stopping. It took them only about eight days and more…
7 Pieces of Advice to Spark Some Inspiration for the New Year:
Be so great, you can’t be ignored.
Take care of the work and the work will take care of you.
Growth is on the other side of discomfort.
Failure teaches you everything you need to know to be successful.
Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.
There’s only one person you spend all your time with and that’s you, so do yourself a favor and be as fascinating as possible.
I’d rather regret the things I did than the things I never tried.
To succeed in 2025, a therapist says do 5 things: It works ‘any time of year’ To shift from ineffective resolutions to meaningful manifesting any time of year, says psychotherapist Chamin Ajjan, follow these practical tips.
44 health-boosting habits to feel better in 2025: A full night without waking is not the norm, and that’s OK. “Waking at night need not mean the end of sleep,” says Russell Foster, a professor of circadian neuroscience at Oxford University. “Some find it useful to leave the bed, keep the lights low and engage in a relaxing activity before returning when sleepy again.” It’s the biggest cliché in self-help, but how many of us do it? “Dare to be vulnerable enough to be all of yourself for most of the time,” the psychotherapist Philippa Perry says.
What Happens To Their Brain Waves When Humans And Dogs Connect? It turns out there’s a scientific explanation for our strong bond to our dogs. Here’s how your pup influences your brain’s activity.
5 science-backed habits that will actually make you happier
Brunch with a View Gala to Support Mental Health, Oct 19th at Viewpoint Brewing in Del Mar
The Zen Den Experience at Cause SD Oct 23, 2024: From Purpose to Action
“Adventure is not outside man; it is within. ”― George Eliot
The Case for Explorers’ Day: This year, I won’t be celebrating Columbus Day or Indigenous Peoples’ Day. More than 530 years after Christopher Columbus led an expedition across the Atlantic Ocean to the New World, many Americans still see the navigator as a symbol of their country’s origins. Others see him as a progenitor of colonialism, enslavement, and genocide. So, the day that honors him, the second Monday of October, is unusually polarizing among federal holidays.
While Astronauts Probe Outer Space, Psycho-Nauts Probe Inner Space
What we can do to help ourselves and others navigate the journey towards joy and happiness…
The Pleasure Principle:
Moons ago, Dr. Paul Pearsall, elegantly blending neuropsychology and the kahuna traditions, inviting us to go beyond the conventional questions to determine our health and wellbeing we hear in our average of “7 minute annual doctor visits” – from gleaning familial history, to our diet and what we ate, to exercise and how much and how often, to our stress level and how stressed we felt, to asking if we were happy!
Many with genetic predispositions, lousy diets, limited exercise, and high levels of stress, seemed to offset these “preconditions” because they loved what they were doing and self-reported as happy.
The Pleasure Principal matters!
BTW, this is not an excuse to eat poorly or be coach potatoes, but speaks to the power of pleasure in our lives…
You deserve Joy!
A New Model for Assessing Mental Health:
Recent frameworks, rather that simply focus on symptomology and severity of symptoms, adds an additional dimension to the consideration set on the “WHY” axis; namely flourishing or languishing.
Some of us have tons of symptoms but are seemingly flourishing. Others are asymptomatic but seem to be languishing.
DSM-5 “labeling” is less about helping us, and more about managing cost (not managing care) in a system that cares more about money management than real people issues, so explore both symptoms and the languishing/flourishing continuum for your own wellbeing!
An Updated Reframing of Stress and Addressing It:
Our old model for dealing with stress, asked limiting questions such as “how do I cope”? The new model posits higher order questions and reframing like when demands exceed resources, we are stressed, so it is up to us to resource ourselves, rather than hunker down, bite the bullet and pretend nothing is happening…
If you just need some modest tweaks to your current state, the next link will help you resituate.
If things are a bit more severe than that, for you or loved ones, please consider professional support like Fundamental Health with “Brunch with a View” happening locally on October 19th (read on)
5 science-backed habits that will actually make you happier: They’re all easy, don’t worry.
The Brunch with a View Gala to Support Mental Health, Oct 19th at Viewpoint Brewing in Del Mar:
Wyatt Hinshaw, Founder & CEO of Fundamental Health, is joined by the mother (Cate) of Fundamental Health’s first client, to chat about the mission of the organization and how Fundamental Health connected Cate’s son with a health provider that changed the son’s life. Hinshaw and Cate discuss Fundamental Health’s impact since its December 2022 inception, along with the October 19, 2024 “Brunch with a View Gala” that will be held at the Viewpoint Brewing Company, with me co-hosting this podcast interview.
Use the Code: Causeconf30off and get 30% off the ticket price and connect with kindred spirits to do purposeful work both for yourself and at the systems level.
You can Tune up and Tune in at the Mission Fed Zen Den with massage stations, yoga, singing bowls, breath breaks and 13 practitioners offering you personalized self-care all day!
My first experience with volunteerism, at about 11 years old was feeding formula to undernourished kids in a slum in Bombay, now Mumbai, which less than a mile from where we lived, housed nearly a million people in a couple of square miles!
My peers thought I was nuts, but it shaped my world view and sparked a profound appreciation for how different life can be based on luck of the genetic draw, circumstances, and how each of us can do our part to make life a little better for those around us.
Decades later, I would never have imagined, that in one of the most prosperous nations on earth, kids in San Diego were going home hungry over the weekend.
I thought this was a developing world problem not a firstworld problem, but alas, this is a reality for way too many San Diegan kids and their families.
Indulge me in watching this 5-minute video and if you feel inspired, donate even $1 to help address food insufficiency in our community.
Thanks for your open heart, generous soul, and consideration!
But for the grace of God and winning the genetic lottery go I and perhaps you too…
The surprising truth about loneliness in America American men were said to be in a “friendship recession,” with a survey finding the number of men without any close friends increased fivefold since 1990.
Young people today are stressed, depressed and reshaping the happiness curve Young adults — ages 18 to 25 — report being unhappier now than people in their 40s and 50s. Here are some potential explanations and solutions.
Buy Experiences instead of Possessions to Build Social Connection Shared experiences, more than material things, bring people together Mind & Brain The human being is a “social animal,” as Aristotle suggested. We have a fundamental need to belong. Yet we are living in a time when the U.S. Surgeon General has warned about an epidemic of loneliness and isolation. A lack of social connection can have negative consequences for both our mental and physical health. How, then, might we encourage the feelings of connectedness that are so integral to our well-being?
Neuroscience Says Doing This For Just 1 Hour a Week Can Make Your Brain 5 Years Younger Research shows keeping your brain sharp as you age is easier than you probably imagine.
6 Expert-Endorsed Techniques to Help You Get to Sleep Fast (and Stay Asleep!) Here are some real tactics you can use next time you’re having trouble falling asleep
“History never repeats itself, but it does often rhyme”- Mark Twain
What are the consequences of America’s unresolved history?
That’s the question raised by a new book by journalist and historian Nick Bryant. The book maps a path from the founding of the United States to the current political state of the country and argues that the political divisiveness we see today is a natural part of the country’s story. Nick Bryant joins us to talk about the lessons we can learn from America’s history and is a compelling listen!
If you believe history comes in cycles, and at the end of each cycle comes an inevitable fourth turning- typically of great crisis and upheaval, the fourth turning might be here now!
“Real happiness comes from a continuous effort to become the best possible version of yourself”- Aristotle
Humility is the foundation to a virtuous life. Humility doesn’t get the fanfare of virtues like courage, compassion, or generosity. But without humility, those other virtues won’t get much traction in the quest to live a good life.
Practice Makes Permanent. Perfect Practice Makes Perfect-
These 3 daily practices are the Japanese ‘secret’ for a ‘long and happy life. Okinawa, Japan has the highest concentration of centenarians worldwide. Here are three principles that may lead to their longevity.
Leopard Visits The Same Cow Every Night, Then A Farmer Sets Up A Camera And Sees Why The quiet village of Antoli in Vadodara, Gujarat, India, had a nightly visitor, a leopard. After they observed the wild animal for some time, it became obvious that the creature wasn’t looking to cause harm. Instead, she was looking for someone, an unlikely friend.
If you would like to help defray my out-of-pocket costs for Mailchimp email services, and WordPress hosting, which is a little over $1,000 per year, I would really appreciate the “pay whatever you choose” support for this one-person purpose/passion/positivity project. I will continue to curate content and publish “what matters most” on a weekly basis as I have done for the last 13+ years. No amount is too small, plus it lets me know this investment of time and energy does make a difference. Donate here if you choose: https://www.paypal.com/pools/c/95ulIWevEN
Please pay it forward!
Love and Happiness,
Neville
“An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.”— Benjamin Franklin
Happy Soul Food Friday! 