The most important story is the story you tell yourself, about yourself!
Warning- Adult Content
This Poem was shared with me recently-
This Be the Verse by Philip Larkin:
While I appreciated the sentiment, I also felt a compelling urge to offer up a counter-narrative, and composed this alternative rejoinder in about 10 minutes:
This Be The OTHER Verse
(Philip Larkin In Reverse)
We all have a mum and dad.
You would not be here if they weren’t.
Generations survived when others died.
Paranoid, hoarders, but yes they thrived.
With their history comes some baggage.
It’s inevitable, like rotten cabbage.
That over time will surely decay.
But it’s what we make of it on the way.
Take the good. Improve the bad.
Pass it forward or pass it back.
Evolution means we change.
For the better- not victims of the deranged.
We all have a story, a script, and a state.
Change your story or own your fate.
Turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones
Warrior mind in ancient bones.
Women passes on life to all.
Each one special, large or small.
Make every moment count and matter.
For better pancakes use better batter!
Yes some will try to “fuck you up”.
Choose your mindset, say enough!
Then Philip Larkin will eat his words.
And cast his poem to the birds.
What is the story you tell yourself about yourself?
Your story is what happened- objectively
Your script is how you choose to interpret what happened to you- subjectively
Your state is what you are doing in this moment, to move you closer to your purpose or alternatively away from it
Manage your state in this moment, and if you don’t like the script that was written for you, rewrite it!
“Don’t Believe Everything You Think!”
Too much pleasure can lead to addiction. How to break the cycle and find balance:
Radical honesty promotes intimacy
Be it sugar, social media or sex, the response in our brain is the same: It produces the “feel-good” neurochemical called dopamine, which brings on feelings of pleasure and motivation. “It may be even more important for motivation than for actual pleasure,” says Dr. Anna Lembke, a Stanford Medical School psychiatrist, researcher and author of the new book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence.
Have you ever been in a position where you had to choose between someone you care about and a value that you hold dear? Maybe you had to decide whether to report a friend who was cheating on an exam, or a co-worker who was stealing from the tip jar. This week, we tell the story of a Detroit police officer who found himself in this sort of dilemma, forced to choose between people he loved and the oath he swore to serve his community. What happens in our minds when we have to decide what is right and what is wrong?
Mental Health Awareness Month is just a few days away. Let’s do our part to help ourselves and one another
Mission Fed ArtWalk 2022
The Earth’s Prayer for Earth Day- A 21st Century Complement to the Lord’s Prayer (written on a trip to Europe 13 years ago in 2009)
Rather than even attempt to outdo perfection, given a world view that extends beyond Christianity, coupled with current Eco-Consciousness, could one take the essence of the Lord’s Prayer and extend its reach and impact to a larger audience?
Our Mother, who is here on Earth,
Timeless may you reign and may we never take your compassion for granted.
The time is now, your spirit be served, with our full intention and energy to create a Planet Earth as abundant and blessed as Heaven.
Give each person today, their daily grain so no one goes hungry, and affirm our inherent goodness to care for one another,
as we give thanks for those who today in their actions put the collective good ahead of personal self-interest and remind us to do the same.
And inspire us in all things to maximize our potential for the greatest good as we preserve and protect the legacy we leave for future generations.
For this is our planet, with problems and possibilities, to do with what we can in the time we have got.
Now is forever. Aum, Peace, Amen
Champion of the Earth!
Sir David Attenborough has been named a Champion of the Earth by the UN’s Environment Programme
The prestigious award recognises the 95-year-old’s commitment to telling stories about the natural world and climate change.
Accepting the award, Sir David said the world must take action now to protect nature and the planet.
“The greatest threat to our planet is the belief that someone else will save it.”
Mental Health Awareness Month is just a few days away. Let’s do our part to help ourselves and one another
First apologies to all the people experiencing mental health challenges at work.
A global study by Qualtrics found 42% of people have experienced a decline in mental health.
67% of people are experiencing increases in stress while 57% have increased anxiety, and 54% are emotionally exhausted.
53% of people are sad, 50% are irritable, 28% are having trouble concentrating, 20% are taking longer to finish tasks, 15% are having trouble thinking and 12% are challenged to juggle their responsibilities.
Other data suggests that 67% or 7 out of 10 people’s feel that no one checked up on their mental health in the workplace. This is a travesty and unconscionable…
Using the indigenous wisdom traditions of Polynesia and the Ho’oponopono framework, please accept my apologies. As a system we have failed you!
We are very Sorry
We Love & Value You
Please Forgive Us
Authentically Navigating Mental Health in the Workplace is powerful and very relevant work arguably a meta-competency for 21st century leadership and culture and portends the future of HR Leadership!
In a post pandemic environment, Pandora’s Box is opened and there is no stuffing everything back in. Sunlight is the greatest disinfectant.
This might mark the beginning of the demise of a command and control model of running organizations, with the power imbalances and systemic disenfranchisement that goes along with it.
Hell bloodletting was a best practice for over 1,000 years and we got rid of that. How is this any different? We are sucking the lifeblood out of people just using bigger leeches!
and communication is the most powerful socio-emotional learning tool, then it is time for a new model that girths all the work we do in stakeholder-centric systems to meet the moment, as well as to counter the great resignation/great migration with the great rejuvenation.
Note: I use stakeholder not employee because all the people in the ecosystem (not ego-system) matter!
No more “othering”…
This is a systems thinking problem not an individual human capital deficiency. People are disengaged and unwell not because they are bad or sick people, but because we have built maladaptive systems.
Think of all the lost potential in every organization ☹
“At the heart of a learning organization is a shift of mind – from seeing ourselves as separate
from the world to connected to the world, from seeing problems as caused by someone or
something ‘out there’ to seeing how our own actions create the problems we experience. A
learning organization is a place where people are continually discovering how they create their
reality. And how they can change it.” — Dr. Peter Senge
Renormalizing “its ok to not be ok” and destigmatizing stigma and shame around mental health is a cultural and paradigm shift in dire need of an intervention.
The piercing pain of the first arrow is hard enough. We don’t need the second arrow.
The parable of the second arrow is a well-known Buddhist story about dealing with suffering more skillfully.
It is said the Buddha once asked a student,
‘If a person is struck by an arrow, is it painful? If the person is struck by a second arrow, is it even more painful?’
He then went on to explain, ‘In life, we can’t always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. This second arrow is optional.’
Let’s equip each other not to create self-inflicting wounds with that darned second arrow!
The Old model of mental health DSM-5 with all its controversies typically focuses on symptomology and severity
The New model must both look at symptoms (low to high) and languishing v. flourishing on another axis
One can have symptoms of “dis-ease” and still be flourishing.
Most of us have symptoms as the data indicates…
The old model of stress was “can I cope”? The new model recognizes that when demands exceeds resources we experience stress
Now, more than ever, we need to resource our individuals, teams, and organizations better to meet the deep stack of demands that are thrust upon us.
Note: If your organization is looking to up level your resources and apply real world experience to meet the demands of navigating mental health in the workplace, reach out to:
They expanded my understanding and were powerful positive forces of good for me!
Kevin Hines Survived a Jump Off The Golden Gate Bridge- Now, He Is Helping Others Avoid Suicide:
This suicidal person “needs to hear what I needed to hear. That we care about you, your life does matter, and that all we want is for you to stay,” he says. “If someone had looked at me on that bridge or on that bus and said that to me, I would have begged for help.”
For 38 years, Mission Fed ArtWalk has celebrated both visual and performing arts in San Diego. We believe art has the power to connect communities, cultivate new artistic talent and create a better quality of life for all through cultural enrichment.
On Saturday, April 30 (11am – 6pm) and Sunday, May 1 (10am – 5pm), artwork will fill the Little Italy neighborhood. Attendees come to view and purchase artwork, enjoy music and dance performances, and participate in interactive art experiences.
Thanks this week go to Deborah and Haley U, Jamie J, Dan L, and the Mission Fed ArtWalk Team for your contributions!
Please pay it forward and be a Champion of the Earth…
The Most Important Leadership Skill According to Research:
If you are committed to positive relationships and a compelling organizational culture that drives results, here is the leadership competency that will have a huge bearing on the present and future world of work with constructive effects on:
The mental health stats cited here from September of ’21 have arguably only got worse in our VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous) world.
New conditions call for new responses, in this case maybe just turning up the volume on this important leadership competency.
Changing your diet could add up to 13 years to your life, study says Switching from a typical Westernized diet of red meat and processed foods can add up to 13 years to your life if you start at age 20, but even people in their 60s can add years.
Press 3 for a pep talk from kindergartners. A new hotline gives you options for joy What started as an art project at a California elementary school has gone viral. The free hotline offers wise advice and encouraging messages from kids to anyone who calls.
Madeleine Albright- The highest ranking women in the history of American government of her time
Madeleine Albright was a force. She defied convention and broke barriers again and again. She was an immigrant fleeing persecution. A refugee in need of safe haven. And like so many before her — and after — she was proudly American.
As the devoted mother of three beloved daughters, she worked tirelessly raising them while earning her doctorate degree and starting her career in American diplomacy. She took her talents first to the Senate as a staffer for Senator Edmund Muskie followed by the National Security Council under President Carter. And then to the United Nations where she served as United States Ambassador, and ultimately, made history as our first woman Secretary of State, appointed by President Clinton. A scholar, teacher, bestselling author, and later accomplished business woman, she always believed America was the indispensable Nation, and inspired the next generation of public servants to follow her lead, including countless women leaders around the world. Madeleine was always a force for goodness, grace, and decency — and for freedom.
TedX San Diego is happening this Sunday both in person and live streamed, at the Preby’s in La Jolla after 2 years of hiatus due to the pandemic. In person is already sold out, but do join the live stream
The speakers and topics are fantastic!
Mission Fed is proud to support this year’s TedX San Diego event and if you are interested in the livestream experience, sign up. You will really enjoy the content!
This week: Self Care, Ukraine, Spring Has Sprung, Daylight Savings and Cute Nat Geo Photos
Which Wolf Will You Feed?
An elderly Cherokee Brave was teaching his grandson about life.
He said, “A battle is raging inside me…it is a terrible fight between two wolves. One wolf represents fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”
The old man looked at the child with a firm stare. “This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute, and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The elderly Cherokee replied: “The one you feed.”
Make sure to feed the right wolf this week!
Ukraine- No Bystanding!
Ready to Die? Why Most People Flunk the Zelenskyy Test. Tyranny has triumphed in recent years because real courage is rare.
The Ukrainian girl who sang ‘Let It Go’ from a bomb shelter gave us all hope Every person fighting for Ukraine, every family ripped apart by this war – they grieve because they love. This is the language we all speak.
Sleep experts say Senate has it wrong: Standard time, not daylight saving, should be permanent The Senate voted unanimously Tuesday to make daylight saving time permanent, but many sleep experts argue that the U.S. should adopt year-round standard time.
This week: Feb 17 was Random Acts of Kindness Day but we should practice this amazing heart-set all year long!
The Health Benefits of a Random Act of Kindness Random Acts of Kindness Day doesn’t have to be limited to one day a year. A simple act of kindness does much more than help the receiver, studies show, and any kindness you give to others is also a gift to yourself.
Dog Saves Dog After Lab Alerts Owner to Golden Retriever Trapped in Sinkhole for Nearly a Day Wrigley, a chocolate Labrador retriever, located the other dog stuck inside a hole at Marilla Park on Saturday, according to Streator Animal Control
Birds are Remarkable and Beautiful Animals – and They’re Disappearing from Our World In the past half century, North America has lost a fourth of its birds. Earth is now a coalmine, and every wild bird is a canary
The Incredible Winners of the 2021 International Landscape Photographer of the Year Competition:
Misty valleys and magical woods win prestigious photo contest The judges chose from 4,504 entries, with photographers from the U.S and Turkey claiming medals. Here are the winning shots and shortlist favorites.
Celebrating the 50th Anniversary of a Song that Transcends Time and Space:
Playing for Change- Song Around The World
“The Weight,” features Ringo Starr and The Band’s original member Robbie Robertson, along with musicians across 5 continents. Great songs can travel everywhere bridging what divides us and inspiring us to see how easily we all get along when the music plays. Take a load off and turn it up!!
The Doomsday Clock Reveals How Close We Are To…Doom The clock isn’t designed to definitively measure existential threats, but rather to spark conversations about difficult scientific topics such as climate change, according to the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists, which created the clock in 1947.
The Bad Guys Are Winning If the 20th century was the story of slow, uneven progress toward the victory of liberal democracy over other ideologies—communism, fascism, virulent nationalism—the 21st century is, so far, a story of the reverse.
Plum Village, France 10:30pm 21st January, 2022 Dear Beloved Community, With a deep mindful breath, we announce the passing of our beloved teacher, Thay Nhat Hanh, at 00:00hrs on January 22, 2022 at Từ Hiếu Temple in Huế, Vietnam, at the age of 95. Thay has been the most extraordinary teacher, whose peace, tender compassion, and bright wisdom has touched the lives of millions. Whether we have encountered him on retreats, at public talks, or through his books and online teachings–or simply through the story of his incredible life–we can see that Thay has been a true bodhisattva, an immense force for peace and healing in the world. Thay has been a revolutionary, a renewer of Buddhism, never diluting and always digging deep into the roots of Buddhism to bring out its authentic radiance. Thay has opened up a beautiful path of Engaged and Applied Buddhism for all of us: the path of the Five Mindfulness Trainings and the Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings of the Order of Interbeing.
As Thay would say, “Because we have seen the path, we have nothing more to fear.” We know our direction in life, we know what to do, and what not to do to relieve suffering in ourselves, in others, and in the world; and we know the art of stopping, looking deeply, and generating true joy and happiness. Now is a moment to come back to our mindful breathing and walking, to generate the energy of peace, compassion, and gratitude to offer our beloved Teacher.
It is a moment to take refuge in our spiritual friends, our local sanghas and community, and each other. We invite you to join our global community online, as we commemorate Thay’s life and legacy with five days of practice and ceremonies broadcast LIVE from Hue, Vietnam and Plum Village, France, starting on Saturday January 22nd. Please see our website for more details coming shortly: www.plumvillage.org/memorial
Let us each resolve to do our best over the coming days to generate the energy of mindfulness, peace, and compassion, to send to our beloved Teacher. Over the coming hours on the Plum Village website, we will publish some inspirational chants, texts, and mindfulness practice resources, to support you to come together with your local sangha to generate a collective energy of mindfulness and compassion, and create your own ceremony or session in tribute to our Teacher. As Thay has always taught, nothing is more important than brotherhood and sisterhood, and we all know the power of collective energy.
The Thich Nhat Hanh Foundation | 2499 Melru Lane, Escondido, CA 92026
“This body is not me; I am not caught in this body, I am life without boundaries, I have never been born and I have never died.Over there the wide ocean and the sky with many galaxies, All manifests from the basis of consciousness.Since beginningless time I have always been free. Birth and death are only a door through which we go in and out.Birth and death are only a game of hide-and-seek.So smile to me and take my hand and wave good-bye.Tomorrow we shall meet again or even before.We shall always be meeting again at the true source, Always meeting again on the myriad paths of life.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
Learning Leadership from a Great Master Courtesy of Moshe E and the Amare Wave: Last week, Thich Nhat Hanh died peacefully at 95 years old. Thầy, as he was known, was a Zen Master, global spiritual leader, and peace activist, renowned for his powerful teachings on engaged Buddhism and bestselling writings on mindfulness and peace.
Thầy was also a model for modern day leadership, one who made love the center of his being and work. Love-centered leadership (the essence of The Amare Wave) believes, as Thầy did, in promoting nonviolent solutions to conflict and raising awareness of the interconnectedness of all beings.
His passing invites us to clarify our own guiding beliefs and principles. What are your core leadership principles? Are you willing to commit your company to total non-violence? Will you integrate the fact of our interconnectedness into your business vision?
“True self is non-self, the awareness that the self is made only of non-self elements.
There’s no separation between self and other, and everything is interconnected.
Once you are aware of that you are no longer caught in the idea that you are a separate entity.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh
The Profound Power of Nature:
Arizona Monsoons that will reset your state!
Thanks this week go to beloved Master Thay, Moshe E, Killu S, Nicole K, Catherine G and Bob C.
Consider paying it forward…
“We will be more successful in all our endeavors if we can let go of the habit of running all the time,
and take little pauses to relax and re-center ourselves.
A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed that as one problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.
In about twenty minutes, she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.
Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me, what do you see?” “Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” the daughter replied.
Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, mother?”
Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity—boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.
“Which are you?” she asked her daughter.
“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond?
Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?”
Think of this: Which am I?
Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?
Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?
Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.
When the hour is darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?
Here’s my hope for you: May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make you happy. The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything—they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
As a business professional, your time and efforts are dedicated to the service of others. “Giving back” is your practice, and you often devote more time taking care of others than yourself. Given all that you have on your plate, you can feel depleted and overwhelmed, finding it challenging to operate at peak performance. Isn’t it time to do something to enhance your life and well-being, which in effect will benefit those you serve? North County Philanthropy Council (NCPC) believes in the importance of balancing self-care with care for others. That’s why we’re offering Mentorship 2.0, Fostering a Community of Practice, a new model of mentoring that brings together business professionals to guide, motivate and support each other. Please Join UsMonday, Feb 8, 20229:00 to 10:30 am on Zoomfor an informational session aboutMentorship 2.0, Fostering a Community of PracticeKen Druck, Ph.D Our information session will feature best-selling author and international expert in mentorship, executive coaching and compassionate self-care, Dr. Ken Druck. Ken will share his thoughts about the magic and power of mentorship, and how we become the best version of ourselves by bringing out the best in others. ATTEND THE INFO SESSIONWhat is Mentorship 2.0? With Mentorship 2.0, you’ll be part of a cohort of 4-7 individuals from our community to brainstorm ideas, identify business resources, develop their networks, explore career opportunities and provide emotional support to each other. Unlike the traditional mentorship model that pairs a more experienced “mentor” with a less experienced “mentee,” Mentorship 2.0, Fostering a Community of Practice, connects leaders at all levels who share a common concern, set of problems or interest in a topic and who come together to fulfill both individual and group goals. It recognizes that our unique experiences are valuable and that collaboration often yields innovative solutions. As a cohort member, you’ll be making a 4-month commitment to the program (March through June 2022). Your group will be expected to meet at least four times during that period (virtual sessions until it is safe to connect in person). The logistics, where to meet and how often to meet – as well as how to measure success, will be decided by the cohort. A member of NCPC’s Mentorship Committee will serve as your group facilitator, providing conversation prompts and guidance, as needed. The relationships that develop and the benefits derived from the experience are entirely up to you and the other group members. We hope you’ll take part in the launch ofMentorship 2.0, Fostering a Community of Practice.REGISTER NOWAttending on Feb 8 is not a commitment or required, but is strongly encouraged.Please register by Feb 1. If you are interested in Mentorship 2.0 but unable to attend the information session, contact Sandra Alston at 760.729.6711 or email@example.com. All the best, Alex Goodman Chair, NCPC Mentorship Committee P.S. Do you have friends or co-workers who you feel will benefit from Mentorship 2.0, too? Feel free to forward this invitation to them. Participation in the Feb 8 meeting is limited to 100 people, so don’t delay.
North County Philanthropy Council | 760-729-6711 | PO Box 1641, Carlsbad, CA 92018
18th Annual Nonprofit Governance Symposium- Jan 27th, 2022:
So How do we Ring in the New Year with a Smile?L’chaim!
It comes courtesy of the phenomenally talented Lin-Manuel Miranda on the occasion of his own wedding back in 2010. Manuel was already a rising musical star but hadn’t hit the stratosphere of fame that would come years later with his musical Hamilton. For this lover of musical theater, there seemed to be no better song to sing to his bride Vanessa than one inspired by a culture and a time far different from his own. Such is the universality of hope, and music. The joy on the faces of everyone involved is impossible to contain!