Author: Soul Food Friday

This week:

Consider some non-material soul-filling gifts

Repurpose some everyday items found in elementary school to create a grab bag for the greater good, (thanks Mrs. Howard)
Enjoy a twist on the thanksgiving theme & experience some blessings based on the Platinum Rule:

“Do unto others, as others would have done unto them”

 For those of you that enjoy the wonder of nature, I am sure you will be awed by the link below

This amazing video was taken in Ireland, on the River Shannon:

http://vimeo.com/31158841

Thanks Jessica

Peace, Love and Well-being…

Neville

Holiday Season Giving and Receiving 

It is better to give than receive

A powerful human sentiment that ties nicely with the spirit of the holidays regardless of your beliefs and values 

An interesting question to ponder then is what is the most valuable gift you could give to others this year?

Here are some gifts options for you and yours…

  

*** The FIRST gift is the gift of time.

 “Just being with someone can be of great comfort to that person”. 

*** The SECOND gift is the gift of good example. 

Most people learn fundamental attitudes by observing other people. 

*** The THIRD gift is the gift of acceptance. 

People often begin to change when they realize they’re being accepted for what they are. 

 *** The FOURTH gift idea for those who are so often busy and distracted these days is the gift of privacy – that is, time of one’s own.

Too often, we smother people with questions and demands on them and their time. 

*** The FIFTH is the gift of seeing the best in people.

“How can you see a ‘fine’ picture of someone close to you – when that person doesn’t always seem to be so fine?

Often you will see what you expect to see.” 

 *** The SIXTH gift is the gift of self-esteem

Not crippling others by nagging or criticizing – especially those we love. That’s particularly a tough one for millions of people every day. 

 *** The SEVENTH gift,  might be the giving up a bad habit.

*** Number EIGHT is the gift of self-disclosure.

Bottling up feelings and resentments deprives the other person of truly knowing who you are. 

 *** The NINTH gift idea is the gift of helping someone learn something new.

It is an investment in their future happiness. 

*** The TENTH gift is the gift of really listening.

“Few of us know how to truly listen in an effective manner”. 

*** The ELEVENTH is the gift of fun!

It’s important to help those close to you to find the fun in ordinary, small events. 

*** Finally, the TWELFTH gift is letting others give to us.

 “When we let others give to us”, “and when we can accept their gifts in a gracious and mature manner, we may be giving them one of the most important gifts of all.” 

Need something a bit more tangible?

May the intrinsic value in the following items remind us simpler times and richer cultures, where each is affirmed and valued just for who they are, and where the cost of the gift had no bearing on its real value… 

If you are so inspired, you can actually create a “grab bag” of many of the following items and “gift them” to other like-spirited souls. They may prefer an iPhone 4s but they would probably benefit more from these: 

AN ERASER- Everyone makes mistakes. There will be times when we need to try something more than once-maybe many times, before we are successful.

Here’s to erasing all of our mistakes in the past year, AND learning from them 

A PENCIL- We all have good ideas. Some ideas are really great and should be written down so they are not lost or forgotten.

Here’s to penciling in your great ideas and turning them to actions in 2008 

A PAD OF PAPER- Communication is very important. We express ourselves in many ways including writing and pictures.

Here’s to improving the quality of our communications with those around us, through active listening, open sharing, and a genuine desire to hear each other’s story 

ONE BAND AID- The Band aid reminds us not to hurt others.

Here’s to Good Thoughts, Good Words & Good Deeds, and the ability to promptly apologize if we are hurtful, as well as fully forgive if we are hurt 

TISSUES- When one of us is sad, it affects us all. Let the tissues remind us to be aware of and sensitive to each other’s feelings.

Here’s to openly expressing our emotions without fear of judgment & letting others “let it out” 

A RUBBER BAND- Routine is increasingly part of our daily lives.  When changes occur-by design or default-let’s remain flexible and like the rubber band not get bent out of shape.

Here’s to flexibility in daily life in mind, body & spirit 

ONE BUTTON- Respecting one another is a hallmark of a highly developed culture. Sometimes, it may be difficult to think of something nice or appropriate to say. In these cases, the best thing to do is to simply “button our lips” and keep our mouth shut. Whoever said, Sticks and stones can break our bones, but words can never hurt me” didn’t know what the heck they were talking about. Here’s to honoring the absent and knowing when to button our lips 

HUGS & (Hershey’s) KISSES- Sometimes a smile or hug can make the difference between an “okay” day and a “great” day.

Here’s to not being stingy with our smiles and hugs, and knowing the right time, place and way to deliver them with mucho gusto! 

HAND- Raise a hand and help others.

When someone offers you a hand, take it.

Here’s to those that rise by lifting others, and to those who know how to ask for a hand when they need it

• Total value of each individual item – Pennies
• Total cost in buying a bag of each for those close to you – Dollars
• Total return on investment of applying these simple principles in a complex world- Priceless!

 

In the spirit of Thanksgiving let’s BE THANKFUL

Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire. 
If you did, what would there be to look forward to? 

Be thankful when you don’t know something, 
for it gives you the opportunity to learn. 

Be thankful for the difficult times. 
During those times you grow. 

 Be thankful for your limitations, 
because they give you opportunities for improvement. 

Be thankful for each new challenge, 
because it will build your strength and character. 

Be thankful for your mistakes. 
They will teach you valuable lessons. 

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary, 
because it means you’ve made a difference. 

It’s easy to be thankful for the good things. 
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks. 

Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive. 
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings. 

-Unknown

Here are some blessings applying the platinum rule: “Do unto others, as others would have done unto them”… 

For the sacred:
“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.”
  ~Meister Eckhart
 
For the secular:
“The Thanksgiving Day is a jewel, to set in the hearts of honest men;
But be careful that you do not take the day, and leave out the gratitude.”
  ~E.P. Powell

For the minimalist:
“As we express our gratitude, We must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.”
  ~John Fitzgerald Kennedy
   
For the optimist:
“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.”
  ~Irv Kupcinet

Happy Soul Food Friday!

Hope you experienced this week well…

It is fun periodically to see things differently and to see different things to expand our perspective about what is possible and rethink impossible

Check out this amazing example of human creativity from the 2011 Sarasota Chalk Festival

http://www.cruzine.com/2011/11/15/3d-chalk-street-art/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+Cruzine+%28Cruzine%29

Thanks Brad and Allison

Even if you are not the touchy feely type, we can all use a good hug every now and again…

Always been torn between wanting to wrap your arms around a wild animal yet your basic instinct for survival overrides that fleeting idea? Here is a royal hug for you!

Interested in increasing your energy but not sure what’s either adding to yours or taking away from it?

Try this quick assessment and then act on what you learn

http://www.theenergyproject.com/tools/the-energy-audit#step1

Thanks Robin

Here’s to your creativity, well-being and energy!

Love,

Neville

Happy Soul Food Friday!

One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is to not take life for granted.

This TED talk helps crystallize what is important, and what becomes important when you realize your plane is about to crash…

http://www.ted.com/talks/ric_elias.html#.TrRrjWeicSQ.mailto

Thanks Peter

After that reset, enjoy some amazing images of our planet, our only home. Check out:

www.cracktwo.com/2011/04/most-stunning-images-of-earth-ever.html

Thanks Jerry

Wanted to preclude cognitive decline and keep that brain sharp? Click on:

http://www.freebrainagegames.com/

Thanks Larry

Finally, if learning how to learn, and teaching to teach are of interest to you, I think you will enjoy this

http://mindshift.kqed.org/2011/09/dont-lecture-me-rethinking-how-college-students-learn/

Thanks NPR

Be well and pay it forward!

Love,
Neville

Happy Friday!

Here are some posts to enliven your soul…

This year we are going to experience four unusual dates 1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, and 11/11/11, one which just happened this week which was National Philanthropists Day and included an exceptional event downtown San Diego with over a thousand people celebrating the power of giving!

When it comes to unusual dates and numbers, that’s not all.

Take the last two digits of the year you were born and the age you will be this year and the result will add up to 111 for everyone!!!!

This week:

Meet a  very real Captain America and superhero who clearly “gets it”

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7385646n&tag=mncol;lst;1

Thanks Cathy

Enjoy two amazing submissions from Great Britain

One with athletic flair

http://bit.ly/CrazyBikeRide

Thanks Jeff

Then wrap your mind aroundthis expression of creativity

http://www.wimp.com/sheeplight/

Thanks Larry

To the superhero, athlete and creative genius within you…

Pay it forward!

Love,

Nev

And for a little extra inspiration from some furry friends, click on this:

Inspiration

Happy Soul Food Friday!

Your soul is calling, are you listening?

Too busy to feed your soul?

Check your priorities…

How self-aware are you about your “divided brain”?

Here’s a wonderful RSAnimate talk about right brain/left brain roles: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=dFs9WO2B8uI#!

Thanks Rex!

—

Are you a member of the lost generation?

Find out here…

http://youtu.be/42E2fAWM6rA

Thanks
Allison!

—

Do you listen to your heart?

Watch this clip and it is inevitable…
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=SkY03n0_sD8&vq=medium

Change your thoughts, change your life!

A Story…

It will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking. 

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. 

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. 

His bed was next to the room’s only window. 

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. 

The men talked for hours on end. 

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.. 

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. 

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. 

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. 

Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. 

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene. 

One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by. 

Although the other man could not hear the band – he could see it in his mind’s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. 

Days, weeks and months passed. 

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. 

She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. 

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could
be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after
making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. 

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.  He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed. 

It faced a blank wall. 

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. 

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. 

She said, ‘Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.’ 

Epilogue: 

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. 

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. 

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can’t buy. 

‘Today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present .’ 

The origin of this letter is unknown. 

—

Enjoy some local scenes and local flight of delight

http://www.parahawkusa.com/Home.html

—

Marvel at the wonder of animals?

Experience kittens for lunch with special thanks to Larry for the last four submissions…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ds_p52BTEsg

Pay it forward, you can’t take it with you!

Love,

Neville

Happy Soul Food Friday!

This Wednesday I experienced a San Diego educational community double header, first representing Mission Fed at the Dollars for Scholars Scholarship Showcase Reception, which was immediately followed by a UCSD Social Sciences event entitled, “America’s Changing Job Landscape: How Regions Are Reinventing Themselves.”

Dollars for Scholars

First, if you are not familiar with Dollars for Scholars, you must check them out! It is a nationwide program that provides educational scholarships for disadvantaged youth often in foster care or the juvenile court system. It is comprised of  nearly 1,100 locally based, volunteer-driven chapters serving students in nearly 3,500 communities across the country. Last year they raised $42 Million and impacted 41,000 kids in the USA.

More than $2.5 billion have been distributed to more than 1.7 million students through Scholarship America programs since 1958. 

Since 1995, our colleague at Mission Fed, Maurice Chambers has been the treasurer of one of the many local chapters-The San Diego Court Schools Scholarshi,p Foundation, aka Dollars for Scholars, which was created in 1986 to provide scholarships for Juvenile Court and Community Schools (JCCS) students that since their founding in 1986 have distributed an estimated 1,700 scholarships totaling $500,000 to deserving youth. 

We have been supporting them for decades and hearing the stories of the adversity these young people withstand to press on to become some of the first in their families to get to college, often becoming donors or mentors to this very same program for the next generation of kids are downright inspiring!

Wednesday we got to hear from scholarship recipients Sue Fang, Sherry and Andrea that because of Dollars for Scholars are able to go to USD, UCSD and SDSU respectively thanks to the mentorship and scholarship of this organization that does hugely important work right here in our community. The multi-purpose room in the Student Center at UCSD, where the event was held has banners featuring the likes of Einstein, Fulbright, Eleanor Roosevelt, Earl Warren, Thurgood Marshall, Roger Revelle and John Muir. But Wednesday it was Sue, Sherry and Andrea that were the most profound and poignant voices to be heard bringing clarity and definition to “multi” PURPOSE. Thanks to all the individuals and organizations that mentor and financially support this fine group of kids and the outstanding financial aid counseling they get to not go into massive student loan debt-currently over $1 Trillion and collectively higher than credit card debt in this country! 

Ok so once you have defied the odds and earned that college degree, what do you do with it in today’s economic climate? 

America’s Changing Job Landscape

“America’s Changing Job Landscape: How Regions Are Reinventing Themselves” featured thought leader Mary L. Walshok, PhD with a hard-hitting look at where America’s employment growth will come from, and how we can stimulate the growth our economy sorely needs. Dr. Walshok took us down an intellectually honest journey of the anomalies, paradoxes, contradictions and disconnects between higher education and effective workforce preparation.

Here are some sobering facts:

• 3.2 million jobs are currently unfilled, even though 14 million people are looking for work.
• 43% of college enrollees still do not have a degree after 6 years of training.
• 90% of the new jobs created in this country are in companies that are 5 years old or less.
• 50% of the companies on the Fortune 500 list were not on that list 30 years ago.
• 33% of the 47 million jobs we expect to create over the next decade will require a bachelor’s degree and 30% will require a community college or skills certification degree. 

Clearly, there is a mismatch between where jobs are being created, the skills and credentialing that are required, and our current investments in education and training. Sadly, the United States spends less on workforce training than most industrialized countries and values it less!

Here are some realities and limitations of our current public educational system with far reaching consequences if we really want to be competitive on the world stage:

• No foreign language and global skills requirements.
• No meaningful work experience.
• No project-based learning.
• Rewards individual performance – not team work.
• Absence of advisors/mentors in either the faculty or
  among practitioners.
• Disconnect between those who teach and train and those
  who employ and develop.
• Life-long learning valued only as a source of income,
  not as an educational commitment. 

To equip your 21^st century learner, make sure you offset these limitations… 

In her new book with Henry Devries, “Closing America’s Job Gap” Dr. Walshok provides much needed answers after visiting communities all across America in her current research, funded by the U.S. Department of Labor, NSF and private foundations. Dr. Walshok, an industrial sociologist has been inspired and in turn inspires others to explore and learn from the way regions are reinventing themselves: creating pockets of innovation and economic transformation, often in unexpected places. Mary Walshok is associate vice chancellor for public programs and dean of Extension at the UC San Diego (which does provide effective work force training by the way) as well as an Adjunct Professor in the Department of Sociology.  

Tired of our politicians fighting like “cats and dogs”?

I think that is an insult to the animals!

We sometimes denigrate animals with expressions such as fighting like cats and dogs. This next clip makes us reconsider who are the real animals and what are virtues we might want to emulate: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofpYRITtLSg

 If only I was the person my dog thinks I am… 

In need of a soul food power bar?

My friend and professional colleague Eric Klein has a new (free) eBook- 50 Ways to Leave Your Karma: Freedom, Fear, and the Art of Getting Unstuck.

In 50 short chapters, Eric charms you with practical applications of ancient wisdom practices tailored to everyday life. The integration of personal stories with the latest neuroscience makes this an enjoyable and informative read. And Eric illustrates each point with a quirky dharma doodle that adds a humorous flair.  

This is an e-book so the author also provides links to personal practice that deepen ones understanding.

 You can get a free copy of 50 Ways to Leave Your Karma at:

www.wisdomheart.org/50Ways 

Many of you have heard me talk about paying attention to the all Green Lights in your life, as we tend to take those for granted but are hyper-critical of the Red ones.

Here is a sample chapter in which Eric reminds us to pay attention to the Yellow Lights in our lives as they have something to teach us too… 

How slowing down helps you move faster 

I was riding shotgun – sitting in the passenger seat. Aaron, my 20-year-old son, was driving. He picked me up at the airport and we were now weaving in and out of the afternoon traffic.  

Up ahead, the traffic light went from green to yellow. Aaron gunned the engine and I let out a yelp. 

To me a yellow light means slow down and get ready to stop.

To Aaron a yellow light means speed up and make it through the intersectionbefore you have to stop. We both recognize yellow lights as a warning. But this warning triggers very different behaviors for each of us. 

Yellow lights aren’t only encountered while driving around town. Yellow lights are part of every conversation you have at work and at home. 

Every conversation you have is dotted with conversational yellow lights.

Conversational yellow lights are warnings – signals that the person you’re talking to is:

• Not following your reasoning
• Not accepting your assumptions
• Not understanding your point of view
• Not connecting with your message 

How can you tell if you’re approaching a conversational yellow light?

Whenever the person you’re talking to:

• Disagrees with your opinion
• Expresses doubt or concern
• Asks a challenging question
• Voices an idea that you don’t agree with
• Sends non-verbal signals of confusion, discomfort, disagreement, or disinterest 

These are all signs that they’re out of synch with what you’re saying. You’re not influencing them in the direction you’re intending.You’re not connecting with them. They’re flashing a conversational yellow light. How you interpret their yellow light will determine what you do next. 

Many people interpret a conversational yellow light as a signal to speed up.

They see the yellow light as a threat to their agenda. They
want to move forward, not lose momentum. They believe that slowing down the
conversation will cause them to lose ground. So when a conversational yellow
light flashes, they:

• Talk more
• Argue harder
• Go into detail
• Provide more evidence
• Show more charts and graphs 

They do this because they’re afraid of yellow lights and they recognize that they’re out of synch with the other person. So they try harder and talk more in an attempt to accelerate through the yellow light. 

But here’s the problem. Whenever you blow past a conversational yellow light, you miss the opportunity to make a stronger connection with the other person, understand them better, and have the outcome you want for your conversation. 

When you hit a conversational yellow light – slow down.

Every conversational yellow light is a gift. Every doubt, concern, objection, or question that the other person expresses is a gift. By flashing a conversational yellow light, the other person reveals exactly where they’re stuck, uncertain, and how you’ve lost them.  

Their questions and disagreements tell you precisely what matters most to them.

Their non-verbal signals of confusion, discomfort, disagreement, or disinterest, highlight exactly what you need to understand them more completely.  

When people flash yellow lights, they’re telling you to slow down and shift from being convincing to being curious. When you’re curious, you naturally slow down to learn, investigate, and pay attention. 

A great way to slow down is to ask questions.

Show your interest, respect, and care for the other person by asking questions. And take your time. Ask real questions – questions that you don’t know the answer to. Take more time than feels “natural.” 

The more you slow down and ask questions, the more clearly, precisely, and deeply you’ll be able to address their doubts, concerns, and confusion. Shift your attention from making your point to exploring and understanding their doubts, concerns, and objections. 

Next, time you’re driving your agenda forward – pay attention to those yellow lights.

When you see one, put your foot on the brake, not in your mouth. Slow the conversation down, listen more than talk, ask questions, and deepen your connection with the other person. When you slow down, you’ll reach your destination much more quickly. 

Take a risk, change your life and pay it forward!

Love,
Neville